Any (Arab) port in a storm

All the national newscasts were in an uproar yesterday over lawmakers who had questioned selling several major Atlantic Ocean ports to a company controlled by the United Arab Emirates.

Now, I thought we were boys with the UAE: They don’t support terrorism, they’re pretty “Westernized” — and most importantly they’re effing rich, and there’s nothing this administration loves more than rich people, even if they’re not white.

Well, the administration did approve the deal, but, then again, it was improved by the Homeland Security Department, and we all know how good of a job they did during Hurricane Katrina.

All the lawmakers hit the talk shows yesterday, talking points in hand, to attack the approval of the deal, in a hope that those Arabs, no matter how united their emirates may be, don’t get to control American access ports.

Nevermind that the ports will probably still be staffed by the same people if the deal goes through. We’re living in a post-9/11 world, where it’s okay if security sucks as long as it’s a black or white person.

On a side note, what if they do try to ship in, say, Osama Bin Laden, into Philadelphia, one of the ports that would be Arab-run? We’ll just crack open the package and, whammo!, Bin Laden taken alive!

Lawmakers question Arab-run ports [AP/Philly.com]
Bin Laden Vows Never to Be Captured Alive [AP/ABC News]