Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: OH MY GOD LOOK HERE IS SOMETHING YOU’RE NEVER GOING TO BELIEVE: An apartment had bedbugs!

Earni Young: Raise your credit score!

John Baer: Politicians are crooks. Most of them are also evil.

Stu Bykofsky: My sympathies to Stu on the passing of his mother. This is a very nice tribute to her.

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

Stu Bykofsky: Guys. It’s over. It’s been a good run. I really enjoy quizzo, I’ve been playing it since I was underage, I hang out with Johnny Goodtimes. But it’s over. No more quizzo. If Byko drops a reference to it in a column, we gotta find something else to do at bars. Oh, and, ah, bitches.

John Baer: Ahh, John, you were doing so well with this column — seriously, it was very good — until the Machiavelli quote at the end. Ugh.

Ronnie Polaneczky: Our Damn Money!

Michael Smerconish: Hey, you know that story that’s been in the news recently (it was actually on NBC 10 a while ago, too) about Radnor charging if you get in an accident in the township? Yeah, well I’m going to introduce it all scary-like as if you haven’t heard it before.

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: What? No, really: What? Seriously. Is part of this column missing? Can someone read this and explain to me what, if anything, I’m missing? I mean, I get the story, but why is it an opinion piece by Urban Warrior?

Update, 12:05 p.m.: Just a website glitch. It’s actually an AP story. Huzzah.

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

John Baer: The current Speaker of the State House, who got his job through a shady backdoor deal, hasn’t reformed anything. And we’re supposed to be surprised?

Stu Bykofsky: People call in to WIP and say stupid things.

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: Nobody cares about public health care, they only care about saying they’re big into public health care so they can get elected.

Earni Young: There are condos in Philadelphia.

Deborah Leavy: I went on vacation.

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

John Baer: Some freshman lawmaker is going to fine a horse’s head in his bed from other lawmakers.

Stu Bykofsky: Casinos are rich.

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: The Philadelphia Tribune’s reporters have a lot of cars.

Earni Young: “Prince Charles did not comment specifically about Philadelphia.”

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: John Street doesn’t care about black or white people.

Michael Nutter: Hey, let’s stop and frisk everybody on the street for illegal guns. First stop: Rittenhouse Square! Wait, what’s that? You want to go to Point Breeze and Kenzo instead? Alright, whatever you say.

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

Yesterday:
Stu Bykofsky: I don’t usually write about sports. Can you tell?

John Baer: The mayor’s race is going on this year.

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: City government is incompetent.

Today:
Elmer Smith: Dr. King would have loved these buzzwords and certainly would have hated popular rap music!

John Baer: Ed Rendell can’t read speeches.

Ronnie Polaneczky: Blight! Graffiti! Such a huge problem!

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

John Baer: There sure are a lot of people who might run for mayor.

Christine Flowers: Brown v. Board of Education led to affirmative action! Or, something.

Earni Young: The city is forgetting the middle class. Thanks, Lou Dobbs.

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: The lesson: If people are dealing marijuana, let them do it.

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: Credit where credit’s due: If not for Urban Warrior, the towing companies in Philly would still be bending everyone over. (Well, they still do, they just use Astroglide now.)

John Baer: The state GOP has a new muscleman!

Earni Young: Temple students like Qdoba!

Deborah Leavy: The Gross Clinic should stay, the Barnes should stay! No art should ever be moved anywhere!

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: Hey, the city has an unconstitutional law! Well who wants to fix that?

Stu Bykofsky: Boy, I hope this random man wins his lawsuit against DHL.

John Baer: Fresh off the “Vince Fumo for Governor” column mention, here’s another one: Pennsylvania might be important!

Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

Stu Bykofsky: Committeeman Byko here! Here’s the big secret of what goes on in Democratic committee meetings: I can’t tell you!

John Baer: Boy, political ads sure are stupid.

Urban Warrior Chris Brennan: Lew Blum and his cohorts are worse than Satan.

Earni Young: If you make about $57K, you can still get low-income housing. Hooray, Philadelphia.