Regular Michael Jackson Possibly Still Creepier

A New Jersey police officer wasn’t getting any, so he decided to do the next best thing: Hire a prostitute.

Okay, he didn’t so much “hire her” as “make his own one-man prostitution sting, arrest a woman and then illegally conduct his own strip search.” The Camden Courier-Post explains:

Authorities arrested James Michael Jackson, a police officer with the state Department of Human Services, and charged him with sexual assault and sexual misconduct for the so-called sting.

According to authorities, Jackson, 34, of Toms River, arranged through a service for a woman to meet him Wednesday at a local hotel in Manchester.

When she arrived, Jackson, carrying a badge and gun, told her she was under arrest. He made her take off her clothes and consent to a body cavity search before letting her go, Ocean County Assistant Prosecutor Martin Anton said.

The prosecutor said Jackson overstepped his bounds as a law enforcement official when he placed the female prostitute under arrest and performed a strip search.

Gee, you think, Mr. Prosecutor?

Officer arrested for illegal strip search [Camden Courier-Post]

Toms River Name Change Brings A Tear To Your Eye

Last Tuesday, residents of Toms River, New Jersey, voted to change the name of their town to: Toms RIver, New Jersey. Apparently, the township was never officially called Toms River; it’d been called Dover Township since its founding in 1767.

But, after a few failed attempts in previous years, voters officially changed the township’s name last Tuesday, ending over 200 years of Dover Township’s reign of terror.

Yesterday, there was a ceremony in Toms River to officially change the town’s name. Township Clerk J. Mark Mutter said: “God bless Dover Township. Goodbye Dover Township. Welcome to the township of Toms River!” Whoo, indeed.

The town’s name change was organized by the Name Change Committee, who naturally had members attend yesterday’s ceremony:

“It’s about time for a change,” said Name Change Committee member Ted Davis of Silverton, who wore a black sweat shirt emblazoned with an imprint of an eagle and the words, “Township of Toms River. Nov. 14, 2006.”

That eagle stands for freedom! God bless Tom’s River. God bless America.

It’s Toms River — officially [Camden Courier-Post]