SEPTA Facing Attacks From All Sides

Pennsylvania must pass a budget by the end of the fiscal year, so as to figure out what to waste money on for the rest of this year and next. The fiscal year ends at the end of the month, which (in case you don’t own a calendar) is fast approaching.

This brings us to (what else?) SEPTA. Metro talked with a bunch of “reformers” today, asking them about new SEPTA funding. The transit agency needs a billion dollars (approx.) or else it’s going to kill all its weekday and weekend service and raise the price of tokens to five dollars. Each way.

This would make SEPTA cost-prohibitive for everyone except Tom Knox and our state lawmakers, so everyone in Philadelphia is hoping the state chips in new funding. The dude from Phillyville says that if there isn’t dedicated funding it will allow “other cities to purchase Philadelphia’s public transit infrastructure and remove it from our city. For instance, if you want to catch a ride on a Philadelphia trolley, you’re better off traveling to San Francisco.” So, also, without dedicated funding, Boston will probably just steal Route 12, which will promptly be slamming into buildings because the route follows different street paths than they have in Boston.

Meanwhile, SEPTA has another issue, as a local transgender person has filed a complaint. There’s a sticker on a TransPass (ba dum pum) that marks your gender, and this trans person was apparently hassled for being a drag queen or whatever. The real issue here is: Wow! SEPTA bus drivers care enough to hassle somebody for using someone else’s TransPass? Fortunately, if the state doesn’t give SEPTA new funding, there won’t be any more public transit in the Gayborhood anymore except PATCO, so this should blow over.

The biggest winners in the SEPTA crisis, though, are the lovable scamps asking for a buck for the R5 to get to Ardmore. If fare prices go up, they can ask for a fiver instead of a buck.

Metro recently witnessed a man fitting the description of “Mr. Stranded” collecting cash in Suburban Station from four or five people over about a half hour.

“I don’t want to talk,” he told a reporter whom he had just asked for money “to get back to Ardmore.”

There’s also a field guide to the random Center City people who ask for a buck for the subway because their car got booted or they’re an architect who designed the Kimmel Center, when they’re actually going to spend it on booze or drugs or really bad prostitutes. In case you thought these people were actually telling the truth, pro wrestling is scripted.

Reformers’ Roundtable SEPTA funding fight [Metro]
SEPTA: Not Sure If You’re A Boy Or A Girl [Philebrity]
Police step up forces as needed to head off summertime cheats [Metro]