Holiday Weekend Fun: Dead Sharks, Used Needles

It was only two weeks ago it seemed the animals were going to murder us all and take over. Turns out that plan didn’t work so well, because now the animals have given up and are just committing suicide.

An eight-foot thresher shark beached itself in Atlantic City, New Jersey. [...] Another thresher shark beached itself in New York over the holiday weekend and died as well.

These sharks are fish-eating, not man-eating — I’m not quite sure how that works — so they didn’t even get to bite the legs off a few kids before dying. In a possibly related story, a couple Jersey beaches were also closed over the weekend because syringes and tampon applicators were washing ashore.

Shark Beaches Itself At Jersey Shore [AP/6 ABC]
Thresher shark comes ashore to die [Press of Atlantic City]
Medical Waste Closes N.J. Beaches [AP/Google]
Aug 23: Cute Wittle Doggies Attack Owner