Dolphin Goes Chasing Waterfalls

Last week, a stupid dolphin decided it needed food, so it went to the most disgusting place on earth: The Schuylkill River! Yes, there was (is?) a dolphin in the Schuykill River; police tracked it for a while but then lost it because they have more important things to do than track freaking dolphins.

This is the best part of the story:

It apparently followed a school of herring that was swimming up the Delaware to spawn and veered off into the Schuylkill, where it was spotted yesterday by the police Marine Unit near the Art Museum, said marine unit officer Anthony Kowalski.

The falls at the Art Museum proved too much for the dolphin, so it turned around and headed back downstream, Kowalski said.

So… the dolphin ran into the waterfall near the Art Museum? Ha ha, stupid animals. Once again, we humans prove we are superior because we have created the Internet, where we can needlessly mock things online.

Hungry dolphin ends up in the Schuylkill [Daily News]