Breaking: Phillies On Cover Of ‘SI’

Repeat after me: There is no such thing as the SI cover jinx. There is no such thing as the SI cover jinx.

Gee, Thanks, ‘Sports Illustrated’

Dammit.

Jinx fears arise with Garcia on Sports Illustrated cover [Inquirer]
SI Cover Jinx [Wikipedia]

Leftovers: Albert Pujols, Septuagenarian

• Albert Pujols told reporters in the Dominican Republic that he should have won the MVP — instead of Ryan Howard — because he led his team to the playoffs even though the Cardinals won two fewer games than the Phillies. I think we should go easy on Pujols. Look: Sometimes as people get older — say, in their mid-30s — they begin to get a little senile and say stupid things. [AP/ESPN.com]

• Oh, and, yes, you guessed it: Albert Pujols is a candidate for Sports Illustrated Sportsman of the Year. Probably because he always puts the team in front of himself, so much so that he hit .200 in the World Series so his teammates could get all the glory. Yeah. I’m sure that’s why he did it. [SI.com]

• I’ll just quote the reader who sent this in: “I had to read this about four times before I figured out that he wasn’t talking about Amish people in the title.” [Craigslist]

• An Annapolis paper on our city’s fine mayor, John Street: “Sporting a hairstyle not dissimilar to that of Don King, the flamboyant Philadelphia mayor sounded somewhat like the famous boxing promoter when he declared the city was prepared to make an effort to keep the Army-Navy game ‘for all-time.’” Awesome. [The 700 Level]

Llama Doctors Are Known For Being Great Athletes

We’re rapidly approaching the end of 2006, and all the magazines, newspapers and blogs are getting ready for their year-end awards or something like it. (I’m going to have something here, too. More on that later.)

One of the major magazine “awards” handed out annually is the Sports Illustrated Sportsman of the Year, and a bunch of SI writers have listed their own personal choices for the award. Grant Wahl is the only one with a good choice, going with Zinédine Zidane — that’d be awesome — and most of the other choices are so banal it’s not even worth making fun of. (The BALCO reporters? Phil Mickelson? Lamar Odom? Some blind dude who ran a marathon? Daisuke Matsuzaka? What drugs are you on, Tom Verducci, because I’d like to get some of that!)

But, hands down, the best choice is longtime SI writer Franz Lidz, who chose Dr. Dean Richardson as his Sportsman of the Year. Dr. Dean Richardson! As you may remember, Richardson is the doctor who treated Barbaro, who captured our nation’s attention by winning that one horse race and then nearly dying in another one. Whoo!

But Lidz isn’t choosing Richardson as his SotY due to Barbaro. No, he’s using more personal reasons:

What makes Richardson my Sportsman candidate has less to do with a horse named Barbaro than a llama named Ogar. In the interests of full disclosure, I must reveal that Richardson is my neighbor, and Ogar is one of my pet llamas.

With that line of reasoning, I’m nominating the two dudes who clean the hallway in my building for Sportsmen of the Year. They always do a pretty good job and say “Hello” to me when I pass, and while they haven’t competed in any sporting events this year that I know of, that didn’t stop half of the nominees!

My Sportsman: Dr. Dean Richardson [SI.com]

‘SI’ Writer Lays Down The Law On Dunce T.O.

Commentary on Terrell Owens from the his SI.com column today:

And, though I won’t harp on it, let me say I certainly give more credence to the initial police report than I do the “I didn’t attempt suicide” admission by Owens the next day. Why have we all been so quick to dismiss the Dallas police report from officers on the scene? The report said Owens had attempted suicide, and said his publicist Kim Etheredge told police Owens had been depressed, and said that when officers asked Owens if he had attempted to harm himself, he said, “Yes.” Yet just because Owens denied it all a day later and said he didn’t remember being questioned because he was too groggy, he’s getting a hall pass in many circles. Not in this one.

Yeah, you tell him, Peter King! You’re not giving that bully troublemaker T.O. a hall pass even though you have no idea what actually happened! Yeah! Don’t give him a hall pass in your circle! Stand up to the media mob!

I’d go down the Linc and tell off Peter King myself tonight, but, wouldn’t you know it, I don’t have a hall pass.

The old, boring Eagles [SI.com]