Larry West Buys A Kilt!

I have attempted to make Philadelphia Will Do your #1 source for Larry West news ever since he randomly showed up at the Milton Street concert/mayoral rally and told everyone he was running for mayor.

Anyway, we now have perhaps the biggest Larry West development yet, as he notes on his blog that he has purchased a kilt.

West writes that he “fucking hate[s] pants” — he drops a Simpsons quote in his post title — and explains the beauty of owning a kilt:

Most men wear boxers for the comfort and feeling of freedom, something we really get to enjoy when we wear shorts in the summer. Otherwise, we wear pants. Tight, restricting, horrible pants. Fuck ‘em! Well, a kilt is better. I had on my boxers, I put a kilt on over them, and my god… paradise! PAR-A-DISE! Walking around the house, feeling free.. my god, FREEDOM!!!!

We then learn West is considering wearing long johns to prevent accidental exposure while donning a kilt. (A recommendation: Boxer briefs! Or, rather, those Jockey mid-rise briefs. Best underwear ever.)

I shall continue delving into Larry West wardrobe news as it develops.

Don’t You Hate Pants? [Angry, Young, And Poor]

Breaking: Harry Potter Book Ruined By Vandals

KYW 1060 reports today a rash of vandals who are cutting out the final pages of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, the final book in the series. Well, okay, not so much of a rash of vandals, but, like, one copy of the book was missing a bunch of the final pages.

Melissa Antinoff from Mount Laurel, New Jersey, was all settled in, ready for bed about to finish ‘Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows’, when she realized several pages were missing: “Well, I could have cried, I got to page 706 and got to what I think is the top of 707 and the two sentences don’t match so I look down and it said 739.”

Frustrated to say the least, Mellisa says she thought of heading back to the bookstore, but it was almost 11 o’clock and she was sure they’d be closed. She had to wait until the morning, and she says she actually dreamed about the book.

I have to agree with Homer Simpson here: “Oh yea, this that fantasy book that even grownups like — broken, lonely grownups.”

Update: Somebody let me know if Will Bunch is kidding here; I’ve been trying to figure it out for a few days and am stumped.

Final Pages of Harry Potter Book Pull A Disappearing Act [KYW 1060]