Chris Freind Column Essentially Condensed PWD

Well, looks like I can retire. America’s Greatest Columnist™, Chris Freind, in a recent column:

• “The organizers said that the fireworks were never ‘officially’ canceled and lit them off a half-hour later, completely disregarding those who had already left. Why did they do it? Obviously for the benefit of the six people at home who happened to be watching Channel 6 at 11:30, expecting the fireworks show.”
• “What other city bombs its own citizens’ houses, destroying an entire city block in a spectacular (and internationally broadcast) firestorm? Name another metropolis that feels compelled to set up a criminal court in the bowels of its sports stadium to arraign fans on the spot.”
• “The convention center is a bust because of the extortion-like hold the unions have over the city. Rather than attracting more conventions to the city - and with them more business, people, money (and tax revenue) - the city continues to lag far behind other cities with far less to offer. Just ask Pat Sajak of Wheel of Fortune.” [??—dmac]
• “And no other team in all of professional sports history has ever had 10,000 losses.”

Yeah, that’s about it. Youse can just read those over and over and, there you go, daily entertainment.

Philadelphia Stays Stuck In Mediocrity [The Bulletin]

Road To 10,000 Losses: You Lose Some, You Lose Some

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a 5-2 loss to the Braves last night, the Phillies stand at 9969 losses, only 31 away from 10,000.

“5-2 final, Atlanta. Goodnight everyone.”

After Harry Kalas ended the Phillies broadcast last night, Post Game Live began. The Phillies fell to 11-14 on the season, dropping to 0-4 against division rival Atlanta Braves. The Braves only need seven more wins to take the season series. I think the Phillies might as well concede it.

I don’t really know why I’m using this line now. When the Braves sweep the series, the more appropriate line will be, “The Braves only need five more wins to take the season series.” It seems odd that by May 2 I could be saying that.

Yes, right. This is the negative Philadelphia fan stereotype. Loving to boo. Having a negative attitude. Blah blah blah. Whatever. This has nothing to do with a stereotype. The Phillies are just a bad franchise. Just like K-Mart is never going to sell Waterford crystal, the Phillies are never going to win the World Series again anytime soon. Not with this ownership. Not with this team.

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