Road To 10,000 Losses: Not-So-Fab Freddy

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a 2-2 series split with the Giants — who, by the way, have 10,000 wins — the Phillies stand at 9972 losses, only 28 away from 10,000.

Freddy Garcia is 1-2 for the Phillies this year, but he might not factor in to a loss tonight. No, it’s not that the Phillies are going to — and this is a silly thought — win. Garcia might not play due to a collision with a cart in the outfield yesterday.

Garcia was warming up before last night’s win over the Giants when the righthander with a 6.05 ERA chased after a Ryan Howard fly ball. Unfortunately, a cart had stopped to avoid being hit by that flyball — and Garcia ran directly into it. He ended up having to be taken off by the cart he ran into and might miss tonight’s start.

Naturally, the Phillies’ brass was content to be confused and use sayings from the 1950s:

“I wouldn’t say I’m upset, but I’m kind of curious why it was out there while we had the field,” Gillick said of the maintenance cart.

“The guy stopped the cart right in front of him,” Manuel said. “Damn, use that head for something besides a hat rack.”

The Phillies play at Arizona tonight at 9:40 p.m. They’re 14-17 and 5.5 games out in the NL East.

Phillies Notes | Garcia hurt by running into a cart [Inquirer]

Road To 10,000 Losses: Jim Salisbury Will Not Tolerate The Phillies’ Lies

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With 4-3 loss to the Braves last night, the Phillies stand at 9970 losses, only 30 away from 10,000.

The Phillies didn’t just lose last night. They also learned after the game Tom Gordon will be heading to Philadelphia to be checked by a team physician. The Phillies’ closer hasn’t been all that good this season, with three blown saves. The new closer is Brett Myers.

But, hey, manager Charlie Manuel successfully performed a double switch last night! After his double switch the Braves’ bullpen retired the next eight batters, but, hey, he tried.

Inquirer writer Jim Salisbury wasn’t happy with anything, though. In the spring, he remembers, the Phillies’ said Tom Gordon’s random visit to Philadelphia was nothing. Nobody believed that, since they wouldn’t send him to Philadelphia unless he had a possible serious injury.

Whom can you believe in the Phillies organization these days? Anyone? [...]

Remember that not-so-secret trip home to Philadelphia that Gordon took in the spring? Remember how team officials insisted that Gordon’s shoulder, which landed him on the disabled list last season, was fine? Remember how the Phils repeatedly said he went home for a routine exam?

Turns out that was a whole load of compost.

Wow. Not only are the fans angry, the sportswriters are angry.

Update: Oh, and the Braves catcher yesterday? A rookie playing in his first game, Jarrod Saltalamacchia, of course. The previous day the Phillies manage to hit the other two Braves’ catches with their bats in the glove — this one was the catcher’s fault — and head, respectively. Go Phils!

Phillies lose the game and Gordon [Inquirer]

Road To 10,000 Losses: You Lose Some, You Lose Some

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a 5-2 loss to the Braves last night, the Phillies stand at 9969 losses, only 31 away from 10,000.

“5-2 final, Atlanta. Goodnight everyone.”

After Harry Kalas ended the Phillies broadcast last night, Post Game Live began. The Phillies fell to 11-14 on the season, dropping to 0-4 against division rival Atlanta Braves. The Braves only need seven more wins to take the season series. I think the Phillies might as well concede it.

I don’t really know why I’m using this line now. When the Braves sweep the series, the more appropriate line will be, “The Braves only need five more wins to take the season series.” It seems odd that by May 2 I could be saying that.

Yes, right. This is the negative Philadelphia fan stereotype. Loving to boo. Having a negative attitude. Blah blah blah. Whatever. This has nothing to do with a stereotype. The Phillies are just a bad franchise. Just like K-Mart is never going to sell Waterford crystal, the Phillies are never going to win the World Series again anytime soon. Not with this ownership. Not with this team.

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Road To 10,000 Losses: Ups And Downs

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a 2-1 series victory over the Marlins, the Phillies stand at 9968 losses, only 32 away from 10,000.

Today, I’m going to recap the Phillies weekend — a series win over the Marlins — by charting the ups and downs of it.

Up: The Phillies won the series against the Marlins. They’ve won 7 of 9, improving from 4-11 to 11-13.

Down: The Phillies 7-2 stretch came against the Astros (1-0), Reds (2-0; lost first game of series), Nationals (2-1) and Marlins (2-1), not exactly the powers of the National League. The Phillies are still 0-3 against the Braves and 1-3 against the Mets.

Up: The Phillies’ two best pitchers, stats-wise, are 3-1 with a 2.65 ERA and 2-1 with a 3.24 ERA.

Down: These two men are 44-year-old Jamie Moyer and 23-year-old Cole Hamels. One needs Geritol and the other needs a date for the prom.

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Road To 10,000 Losses: Losing In November

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a 4-2 loss to the National yesterday, the Phillies stand at 9967 losses, only 33 away from 10,000.

Geeze, even when the Phillies won’t be playing — November 4, 2008 — they’re going to lose.

How, you say?

Yep. George Phillies, Libertarian candidate for president. According to his official website, he’s against “selling our grandchildren into de facto debt slavery,” for civil liberties and presumably for all the normal libertarian free market and such.

Oh, and he’s for ending the Internet poker ban. (”Real Americans know: Poker is as American as apple pie.”) This guy is looking better and better every second.

Plus, hello, his last name is Phillies. I didn’t even know there were people with that last name! God, what a tragedy it must be to go through life with that last name. Everywhere you go, people associate you with the worst baseball team of all time.

George Phillies for President [Thanks, Brad]
Phillies for President [Myspace]

Road To 10,000 Losses: Phils Go For Six

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a five-game winning streak, the Phillies still stand at 9966 losses, only 34 away from 10,000.

The Phillies have been on a bit of a tear recently, winning five straight and improving their record to 9-11. They’ve hit six homers during the streak and the much-maligned bullpen has a 1.38 ERA during the last five games. Morning Glory fan Chase Utley went 5-for-5 last night.

Now, these wins have come against three subpar teams, the Reds (2), Astros (1) and Nationals (2). But, hey, a win’s a win, and the Phils have five games left in April to attempt to get to .500.

The Phillies go for a series sweep and third-straight series win (duh, they already won the series) with 23-year-old Cole Hamels on the mound, who had 15 strikeouts in a complete-game win last Saturday.

Yes, it’s a day game, and the Phillies are still not at 10,000 losses, so you know what that means: Liveblogging! Head after the jump for Chris Wheeler jokes, references to old Phillies you forgot were on the team and, hopefully, Ryan Howard home runs.

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Road To 10,000 Losses: Same As It Ever Was

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a 2-1 loss to the Reds Friday night and wins on Saturday and Sunday, the Phillies stand at 9966 losses, only 34 away from 10,000.

You could see it coming.

With the bats silent for yet another night, the Phillies took advantage of two errors on one play earlier in the game and led the Cincinnati Reds going into the bottom of the ninth inning, 1-0. With the Phillies one out away from their first two-game winning streak of the season… well, you know how this one always goes.

The Phils’ closer, Tom Gordon, gave up a solo homer on a 3-1 count in the bottom of the ninth, then surrendered a bases-loaded single to give the Reds the win in the 10th again. The Phillies are now 0-4 in extra-inning games.

The Phillies rallied to win the next two games over the Reds, and now have won a modest 3 out of 4. They’re now 6-11, which looks a hell of a lot better than 2-8, even though it only means they’ve gone 4-3 in their last seven.

Only 34 to go. I don’t know how they’ll lose ‘em, but I expect they’ll find a way to infuriate me and the rest of Philadelphia.

Road To 10,000 Losses: Phillies Liveblog

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a 5-4 loss to the Nationals yesterday, the Phillies stand at 9965 losses, only 35 away from 10,000. The Phils are playing the Washington Nationals in an afternoon game, and so it’s time for a short liveblog. I’ll try to do this for games when I can this year, since if I’m watching anyway, I might as well write about it.

1:08 - The Phillies score one in the first, but had Shane Victorino on third with one out and he didn’t score.

1:31 - Aaron Rowand, who’s playing so well we better trade him before he starts screwing up, hits a homer to make it 2-0 Phillies. It’s time for the contest to guess how the Phillies will blow this one. I’m thinking the Phils hit into two triple plays.

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Road To 10,000 Losses: The Circus

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With a 5-4 loss to the Nationals yesterday, the Phillies stand at 9965 losses, only 35 away from 10,000.

I’ve written before about how it’s perfect the Phillies will be hitting loss number 10,000 this season because they are finding new ways to lose each and every game so far this season. There are plenty of ways to lose a baseball game. But if the Phillies continue playing as poorly as they are this season, they might actually exhaust all those possibilities.

Last night in the top of the 11th inning, with a man on second and two outs, Cole Hamels — a pitcher pinch hitting because the Phillies were out of players — walked. Jimmy Rollins, one of the best Phillies’ players in this young season, came to the plate. Washington changed pitchers, and the TV broadcast went to commercial.

It wouldn’t have been bad enough — this is Philadelphia, after all — for Jimmy Rollins to ground out on the first pitch thrown by Ryan Wagner. No, instead Rollins ends the inning while Philadelphia fans watching on CN8 see a commercial for the circus.

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Road To 10,000 Losses: Walk This Way

Road to 10,000 Losses is a countdown to the Phillies’ 10,000th loss, coming sometime later this year. With an 8-1 loss to the Mets yesterday, the Phillies stand at 9964 losses, only 36 away from 10,000.

Before two guys you don’t really like nearly fought each other, the Phillies dropped to 3-9 on the young season with an 8-1 loss to the Mets.

The story was, really, exactly the same as every other game. The Phils walked seven times and had one hit batsman, all but one of those runners was stranded. And the only walked player who scored was pitcher Freddy Garcia, who Ryan Howard drove in with — naturally — an RBI walk.

Garcia, an off-season acquisition, gave up three runs in 4 2/3 innings, making him the best pitcher on the Phillies right now.

The Phillies head on the road for five straight games; when they return for a seven-game homestand Monday, there will be a ton of fans At Citizens Bank Park dressed like empty seats.

Mets 8, Phillies 1 [AP/Yahoo!]