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Trentonian Zings Us Again

From the newspaper that brought you the headline “Roasted Nuts” when a psychiatric hospital burned down yesterday comes “Prosecutor’s dick causes wreck, but victims barely paid” when a prosecutor’s detective is involved in a car accident.

Ho ho! I get it.

Thanks, Jon.

Headline Of The Day

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Oh, Action News. This makes up for that text-messaging report.

Polygamist Gets Multiple Sentences [AP/6 ABC]

No Steve Irwin Puns Here, No Sir

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Last night at quizzo — or, since it was New Deck, “Quizo” — I learned a very important thing: It’s already apparently okay to joke about Steve Irwin’s death. (It’s a coping mechanism, I suppose. It’s okay; nobody from his family was there.) Team names included: Six Feet Down Under; Float Like a Crocodile, Sting Like a Ray (uhh, this may have been ours, I don’t remember); about three team names involving “Crikey!” and “Total Eclipse of the Heart” by Steve Irwin and the Stingrays.

Someone from the Daily News, who was moralizing about t-shirts just a few weeks ago, must have been at Quizo last night, too, since today’s cover story headline is “It’s No Croc!” (Isn’t the expression “What a Croc?”)

Which means that the Daily News apparently has these rules: It’s okay to joke about death or violence, as long as it’s thousands of miles away. Naturally.

Irwin’s death caught on videotape [CNN]
Aug. 21: T-Shirt Turned 21 In Prison Doing Life Without Parole

Luck Be A Name That Can Easily Be Made Into A Headline Tonight

You might be surprised to find a feature photo of a Thailand election in the Philadelphia Daily News — but then you realize the Thai prime minister’s name is Thaksin Shinawtra, and the DN could run this photo:

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I’m surprised the caption didn’t note he’s also Chairman of the Board.

Breaking up with Mary Jane

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Heh. That’s funny, because I didn’t think anyone could make it through a Michael McDonald concert without being high.

McDonald returns to A.C. Doobie-free [Camden Courier-Post]

Explosives don’t kill people; bad puns do

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Oh, har har, Action News.

Explosives Truck Flips [6 ABC]