All-Knowing God Now Giving Us Cancer

It wouldn’t take much to be more positive than this blog, but, yes, I believe this newspaper is entitled to call itself the Positive Image with a headline like that. At least the paper’s not called the Subject-Verb Agreement Times.

As for God: This is just like that time he flooded the world as a gift. I guess He’s feeling the credit crunch just as much as the rest of us; either that, or not even He can get his hands on a Nintendo Wii. That’s what we all really want, right?