New Jersey Under Attack From Wild Boars

Ha, ha, people in Gloucester County are suffering from a wild boar infestation.

As many as 100 feral swine are ripping up golf courses, rooting through flower farms and generally making a mess of things in the swamps, forests and fields of Gloucester County. Thought to be descendants of domestic hogs freed from pens at least a decade ago, the belligerent boars have mentally and physically regressed and are no longer the familiar pink porkers slopping it up on lazy little farms. [...] “They eat anything, endangering rare plants and degrading the habitat. They compete with native wildlife, eating the eggs of ground nesting birds like quail and turkeys,” said Lawrence Herrighty of the state Division of Fish and Wildlife.

Feral pigs have been declared one of the most destructive invasive species on the planet, and the federal government estimates about 6 million of the animals are digging up crops and making mud wallows of sensitive vernal pools, where rare reptiles and amphibians reproduce. They also are reservoirs for a host of diseases that impact domestic livestock, wildlife and even humans.

“They are a threat to wildlife, agriculture and landowners,” Herrighty said. “They have to be eradicated.”

Fortunately, the federal government has stepped in to help.

Under a contract finalized in April with environmental officials and the state Department of Agriculture, federal biologists began trapping, testing and killing the hogs in June but so far have bagged only three.

Hmm. Might be best to stay out of Gloucester for a while.

Gloucester bristles as feral porkers run amok [The Star-Ledger]
Photo by mape_s, Creative Commons license

Crash Sends Pigs Onto Rt. 30

CBS 3 reports a pig truck overturned in Chester County. Pigs went all over the runway at around 6 a.m. on the Route 30 bypass in Chester County.

“Tires were squealing,” CBS writes, har de har har. Unfortunately, the members who crashed were not those of the Lehigh Valley IronPigs, who lost again last night to drop their record to 4-28.

Pig truck overturns in Chester County [CBS 3]
Toledo 11, Lehigh Valley 7 [MiLB.com]

Missing Pig Becomes PR Opportunity

The pig that went missing in Warwick has a new ally in its fight to, uh, be found: The Lehigh Valley IronPigs! The Phillies’ new AAA affiliate is offering four free tickets and an all-you-can-eat meal to anyone who turns in the pig.

Also, if the pig is found, the club wants to host it and its owner at a game as MVPs.

“I’m not into baseball, but I certainly appreciate everyone’s efforts,” Magidson said. “That one person who is more interested in baseball just might read (about the IronPigs offer) and might be the person who sees that little piggy in somebody’s back yard.”

Oh, sad. Looks like the animal psychic that’s been hired — I missed this yesterday, but I forget what blog pointed it out to me, sorry — will have to do. The pig is alright, the psychic says! “I’m being told that Mirabelle is in a warm and safe place and that she is still alive.” Let’s hope everything turns out alright.

Flying Pig Farm Destroyed By Blaze

Just to prove that I’m an equal opportunity offender — i.e. it’s not just Barbaro, I must comment on the Burlington County fire that killed 1500 pigs.

In this case, a picture says a thousand words. Or 1500 pigs.

1500 Pigs Killed in Burlco Barn Blaze [KYW 1060]
Nov. 9: Hey The Inquirer Is Doing That Pig Thing Again

‘Inquirer’ Uses Font Size Usually Reserved For Terrorist Attacks To Tell Us Circulation Is Up

You can click to enlarge.

The above is a special pullout only for today in The Philadelphia Inquirer. Not only did the paper project pigs onto the side of the building last night, but in today’s Inky there is a four-page special section complete with charts, graphs and man-on-the-street interviews.

Oh, and seven articles about the Inquirer’s circulation going up and how pigs do indeed fly. One of which quotes a person using the phrase, “Well, I’ll be damned,” which would probably be cut out of the regular paper (”[darned]“) had an individual in a story said it.

My favorite part is the chart on the front page. After losing 40,000 readers the past two years, this year circ has gone up just over 2,000.

A note on Page 2 of the pullout notes: “While the information in this edition regarding The Philadelphia Inquirer, the Philadelphia Daily News and the newspaper industry is accurate, all other information (including but not limited to stories, graphics, artwork and photographs) in this edition is fictitious and satirical. All references to individuals are fictitious, and not intended to refer to any natural persons, whether living or dead. No pigs were harmed in the production of this work.” Yeah.

Now, the section, as you can see, looks exactly like a real news section except it says “ADVERTISEMENT” at the top. We people are a stupid bunch, but I don’t see how someone could see this section as real. But I’m not going to overestimate the intelligence of the average Inquirer reader — especially a new subscriber!

But, ah, really? Wow. Just wow. My brain just exploded even harder than it did while reading that Kevin Michael piece. I’ll try to do a little round up of the inside pages later today if I recover.

Earlier today: Japanimation Fighting Pigs On Side Of Inquirer Building

Japanimation Fighting Pigs On Side Of Inquirer Building

When the Inquirer and Daily News said they were going to increase circulation, people said it was going to be when pigs flew. I’m not quite sure who said this; it was probably the homeless man at the corner of Spring Garden and N. Broad.

Well, apparently, circulation did go up, and so the Inquirer and Daily News decided to celebrate the best way they could: By projecting giant pigs on the building along with an anime-style background. Because what better way to show you’re once again producing quality journalism than by projecting cartoons onto the side of your building.

This little piggie cried “wee! wee! wee!” all the way to 400 N. Broad [Citizen Mom]