Dead Horses Found Beaten In North Philly

Investigators got a tip about unsanitary conditions for horses in a North Philly stable. And it turns out well, the tip was dead on:

Officials from the SPCA said they received and anonymous call reporting the nearly block of stables housing dozens of horses, were rundown. The SPCA along with the Department of License’s and Inspections responded to the scene and found mountains of manure, malnourished horses and a partially buried carcass.

The article said charges are pending as they investigate, but I can only assume that has to be a typo. These are horses, people! Whoever leaves them in conditions like that ought to get a parade down Broad Street. Hell, let me be the marshall, I can ride Zombie Barbaro all the way to the Navy Yard!

Update: I get phone calls about my shitty joke, too!

SPCA: Malnourished Horses Found In Philadelphia [CBS 3]

Andy Reid’s Son Sold Drugs To Your Son

Calling the Andy Reid household a “Drug Emporium” — he also later compared it to Carrefour — a judge yesterday sentenced Garrett and Britt Reid to 23 months in prison while blasting their upbringing. (Judge Steven T. O’Neill really should have gone with a Mountain Meadows massacre reference, but, hey.)

Reid’s son Garrett also smuggled 89 pills in his ass when he went into jail. And to make things better, Garrett was apparently selling drugs in North Philly. (This seems like just bad business. No way he makes as much money on the streets of North Philly than he could have made from rich kids in the suburbs.)

“I liked being the rich kid in that area,” the report quoted Reid as saying, apparently in reference to North Philadelphia. “I could go anyplace in the ‘hood. They all knew who I was. I liked being a drug dealer. . . . These kids were scared of me. I was even selling to their parents.”

Meanwhile, the Eagles and Cowboys play Sunday night and the jokes are just going to get even less clever.

Scrooges In North Philly

The Inquirer’s Amy Rosenberg writes today about a street in North Philly that’s full of Christmas cheer.

Almost every house on the 800 block of North 10th Street is decorated in a smiliar fashion, and the neighbors walked around exchanging presents. (”And so you had Joan Adams in her white bathrobe leaning out of 810 and Marva Lazenbury in her turquoise and pink paisley silk bathrobe and pajamas leaning out of 806,” as Rosenberg puts it.)

But the Inky also blows the whistle on those who didn’t join in the decoration:

Pretty much the only ones who opted out of the decorations were the Jehovah’s Witnesses who live in two homes and the Sturgis family at 807 who, for various reasons, just couldn’t find the time this year.

Not to mention the undecorated house of Glenn “Hurricane” Schwartz.

A block reborn, a neighborhood united in sharing [Inky]
Archives: Hurricane Schwartz

Keystone Cops: School Daze

Keystone Cops is a roundup of law enforcement/crime/public safety news that runs occasionally, since yesterday, on Philadelphia Will Do.

• It’s apparently weird-shit-happening-at-school-week, as a Burlington County teacher had her class quarantined this morning after having an allergic reaction to a white powder. Everything’s okay — well, the teacher is in the hospital — while a bomb scare at a Chester County (?) school turned out to be shoes. Of course. [Inquirer]

• While still facing charges, a woman in Ewing is being treated at the psychiatric hospital after allegedly trying to kill her father by burning down the house. She also believes that “she’s pregnant with God’s baby and is the devil, prosecutors said yesterday,” so treatment seems to be the good idea here. [The Trentonian]

• An 18-year-old in North Philly was shot outside an elementary school. Presumably not one he’s currently attending. [NBC 10]

• And, hey, the alleged screwdriver attacker from West Philly is in custody! Hooray! [6 ABC]

New North Philly Movie Theater Reaches Franklin Mills Theater Status In Mere Two Days

Monday’s opening of the new Pearl Theatre at the Avenue North complex in North Philly near Temple was hailed as the first step in a transition of North Philly into a nicer, happier place with gooey gooey gumdrops and residents whose shit smells like rainbows.

Well, it only two days, but North Philly’s new movie theater has already had a shooting. Philly isn’t really a city for much movie theater mayhem — mostly because there aren’t many movie theaters — but the Pearl apparently is looking to change that.

The shooting, actually, may haven’t even been related to the theater. A 16-year-old boy was shot near the theater complex and taken to Hahnemann in critical condition around 7:30. But the theater was evacuated, which led to even more mayhem afterward. And police aren’t even sure who made the call to evacuate the theater, Will Bunch and David Gambacorta of the Daily News write:

As a result of the shooting, about 100 paying customers were evacuated from the theater. Detectives were unsure last night who had decided to evacuate the theater, but they confirmed that it had led to chaos, with numerous fistfights breaking out. “Basically, they all went crazy,” said one detective. “We don’t really know why, either.”

Indeed, when a reporter arrived minutes after the shooting, groups of youths were still running in every direction, and police had cuffed and pinned two men against a car about 100 feet from the theater. “I didn’t hit you,” an officer yelled at one of the handcuffed men. Later, police said that none of at least four handcuffed people outside the movies was linked to the shooting.

If you’re keeping score at home, that’s: Shooting near movie theater, movie theater evacuated, patrons decide to beat each other up since they have nothing else to do.

However, a member of the anti-violence group Men United for a Better Philadelphia said that, well, this is why North Philly can’t have nice things:

Rich Ford, of Men United for a Better Philadelphia, watched hordes of adolescents yell and shove one another outside the complex, and then questioned the wisdom of putting a theater in North Philly.

“This is not Center City or Manayunk,” he said. “It’s the heart of North Philadelphia. This place is going to draw a multitude of young kids from all over, and these kinds of events will probably be ongoing at this location.”

It’s good to see our anti-violence group members are so committed to finding things for kids to do other than violence. “A movie theater? Hell, don’t put one of those up here!” Sigh.

Violence erupts outside theater [Daily News]
Photo via Philebrity
Tuesday: North Philly Residents Rush To See Crap

North Philly Residents Rush To See Crap

Yesterday was the grand opening of developer and Joey Sweeney patron — that’s a joke, people — Bart Blatstein’s new Avenue North complex in North Philly.

Although there are drawbacks — “It’s definitely going to bring a lot more people. A lot more traffic. I’m definitely going to have to use the crosswalk rather than jaywalking,” Stanley Daniel told Metro — the benefits of the retail/student housing project on Broad Street inbetween Oxford and Cecil B. Moore seem to outweigh having to cross the street at the light.

There $100 mil project features 1,200 student housing units, 20 retail spaces — Qdoba! Foot Locker! Bank of America! — and, best of all, a movie theater. Although Blatstein’s company also built Riverview, The Worst Movie Theater In The City™, prospects are a little better for the Pearl.

But although you can put a $100 million dollar complex in North Philly, you can’t buy taste. Just ask our friend Daniel:

With the gala red carpet opening for the first movie theater in North Philadelphia to open in 60 years going on across the street, Stanley Daniel was trying to get movie times. “Is the new ‘Van Wilder’ playing here?” he asked, while the well-dressed patrons inside ate popcorn and hors d’oeuvres at the opening of the Pearl Theatre at the new Avenue North complex on Broad Street last night.

Unfortunately, The Pearl isn’t playing National Lampoon’s Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj. But the dollar movies running right now aren’t so bad: They have Invincible!

Theater of engagement [Metro]

I Read Phillyblog So You Don’t Have To: A Chicken In Every Pot And A Dunkin Donuts On Every Corner

Ahh, Phillyblog. As Mark B. Cohen might write, Phillyblog is “one of the most important media in Philadelphia today.” Oh, wait, he did write that.

Yes, indeedy, the last time I mentioned Phillyblog — and State Rep. Mark B. Cohen’s wish to have a “Phillyblog Day” — the faithful AOL For Dummies reader responded via comment, saying that Phillyblog members “are a major news source that professional journalists ignore at their peril.”

If there’s one thing I absolutely do not want, it is to be put in perilous situation simply by ignoring an Internet messageboard. But I care about you, dear reader, I really do. And I don’t want you — professional journalist or otherwise — to be put in said perilous situation. With that in mind, today Philadelphia Will Do launches “I Read Phillyblog So You Don’t Have To,” a weekly look at one of the most important mediums in Philadelphia today. If you see an excellent Phillyblog thread (excellent for whatever reason) and think it’d fit in IRPSYDHT (prounounced “eye-rock-paper-scissors-why-D-hat”), simply send an email to dmac@philadelphiawilldo.com.

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