Where Have You Gone, Dick Clark?

The Daily News‘ Kitty Caparella has an nice piece today about the conflicting reports on the death of Bryan Jones, the man who was shot and killed by police just after midnight on Jan. 1.

The story’s definitely interesting all around, but what I found most interesting (and depressing) was this little part here:

The armed celebrants had been inside the party house drinking when they heard the sounds of gunshots outside. They thought it was midnight. So the gun-toting revelers headed to the driveway and spent all their ammo firing in the air, a second reveler said.

When they realized it wasn’t midnight yet, he added, they went back inside to reload their weapons.

Clearly, Dick Clark’s health problems and the subsequent loss of New Year’s Rockin’ Eve — at least the real one, hosted by Dick — has forced our city’s residents to rely on gunfire to know what time the new year is, instead of the usual trusted method of, y’know, a countdown.

Then again, why someone needs to fire his gun into the air to celebrate a pointless milestone is beyond me. Oh, wait; people are stupid. That was easy.

Cops: Danger, controversy [Daily News]

Welcome, Our Planet Hollywood Casino Overlords

Hey, kids, do you like Planet Hollywood? Do you like throwing away your money down little coin slots? Do you like free alcoholic beverages?

If you answered yes to any or all of those, then will you be pumped for the upcoming Planet Hollywood casino! (Hey, we’re going to hold Stallone to his promise to move to the city now.)

Of course, the official slots licenses haven’t been awarded yet. But somebody knows something, because Mayor Street has allowed the Planet Hollywood Riverwalk Casino to sponsor the New Year’s Eve fireworks!

Street actually toasted the casino’s owners for paying for it, which is kind of funny in light of the city turning down DC Shoes’ offer of $1 million for upkeep of LOVE Park if skateboarding were allowed there again. But, then again, white suburban kids don’t have any money of their own, so it makes sense.

Street shot down anyone who thought it was a conflict of interest:

Mayor Street says he’s not concerned about the appearance of any conflict of interest: “The City of Philadelphia, through the Penn’s Landing Corporation, has a contract with these people. They’re sitting on a city site. So we don’t think it’s a problem.”

Wait, what? That’s his rebuttal? That makes it seem like more of a conflict of interest, if anything. He might as well have responded “Yabba Dabba Doo!” or “Gabba Gabba Hey!” or “Everyone knows that time is Death, that Death hides in clocks. Imposing another time powered by the Clock of the Imagination, however, can refuse his law. Here, freed of the Grim Reaper’s scythe, we learn that pain is knowledge and all knowledge pain.”

Sure, they’re all nonsensical replies, but they make about as much sense as our mayor’s original statement.

But, y’know, oh well. At least it’s not another inexplicable PECO sponsorship of something.

Phila. Casino Applicant Will Pay for New Year’s Fireworks
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