Mint Hopes New Dollar Coins Will Capture Americans’ Interest For Whole Week This Time

Whoo! Are you excited? Today is the day! Now that we’ve fully established that we Americans don’t want a coin with a woman on it, the U.S. mint has returned to the traditional system of dead white men on coins. And guess what they’re on this time: A new dollar coin!

Yes, today is the release of the new dollar coins, sure to annoy all of us when we put in a $20 to buy some stamps and get like 10 George Washington dollar coins in change. The new dollar coin is the latest attempt by the American government to ween us off the paper $1 bill, since coins can last longer and, therefore, save money. (As they say, you gotta spend money to make money. Okay, I apologize for that one.)

The new coins feature all of our presidents, in succession, with a new one coming out every three months. Who doesn’t want a coin of noted alleged gay president James Buchanan? (Coincidentally, he’s the only president from Pennsylvania. Also coincidentally, he was an awful, awful president. He also started a war with Mormons!) Or how about Millard Fillmore? Or, even better, the special limited edition William Henry Harrison coin (above) that is only valid for 30 days? Or the Grover Cleveland coin, which will come out on two non-consecutive occasions? (Okay, I’m sorry for all of these, too.)

Yes, these coins are sure to capture our hearts for at least a week until we forget about them — except when we get them from vending machines — and simply use paper bills like we’re always going to do. God Bless America!

New $1 coin goes into circulation [AP/Philly.com]

Reason #56 To Love Philadelphia: Jon Lieber’s Truck

Last year, Aaron Rowand showed up at Spring Training with a jacked up Ford F-250. Jon Lieber couldn’t let that stand. So he bought a house and converted it into a truck.

Well, okay, he special ordered it from Ford. And yesterday, Jon Lieber showed up at Spring Training (hooray!) in a giant Ford F-650. It cost him $211,000, which is cheaper than the same truck models owned by Shaquille O’Neal, the King of Jordan and Sheik Mohammed of Dubai. So he got a great deal!

(I know, I suppose we should hate that truck, since I’m sure it’s responsible for roughly 5 percent of recent global warming, but let’s pretend it runs on rainbows instead of diesel.)

Some fun facts: Passengers must go up two steps to enter the vehicle. It costs $500 to fill up (four 50-gallon tanks) and gets 12 miles to the gallon. The satellite service on the truck costs $4.99 a month. Ford apparently sold 60 of these things to people.

And, yes, it’s owned by a pitcher who went 9-11 with a 4.93 ERA last year yet makes more money than you or I will ever see. Wait, why is this a reason to love the city again?

Lieber’s camp arrival wheely amazing [Daily News]
[Photo via DN, by Jim Stem]

John S. Carter Has 99 Problems

Hey, did you know the Independence Seaport Museum is made of money? I mean, not literally, of course, although that particular situation is represented at right. (See, they haven’t had any renovations in a while, so the building is still covered with the old $100 bill.)

The museum accused its former president, John S. Carter, yesterday of defrauding the company of $2.4 million dollars. Wait. The Independence Seaport Museum has $2.4 million to defraud? I mean, no offense, but, ah, what?

The Seaport Museum also paid Carter $301,000 a year. This is more than the Art Museum head makes and approximately 330,000 times my salary. And yet he still allegedly stole — this is a legal term — “a ton of shit” from the museum, including these:

The suit said he also used a museum credit card to pay $1,315 to a sailmaker, saying it was an Enticer expense - “even though Enticer does not have sails.” [...]

In 2003, Carter claimed $16,771 worth of charges purportedly related to a meeting of the International Congress of Maritime Museums in England. But Carter’s credit-card receipts indicated that he and his wife were not in England, but instead had visited the French Riviera.

In 2004, the couple claimed $7,854 to attend the same conference in Europe, saying they had been to London, Nice and St. Tropez. The problem: The conference is held every other year. It didn’t meet in 2004.

Damn. I got to get myself a job blogging for the Independence Seaport Museum.

Ex-head of Seaport Museum accused of fraud [Inquirer]

Spending $255 Million: It’s A Breeze!

With all the fiscal problems plaguing the school district right now, one might think that the city is facing similar financial troubles.

Not so. In fact, the Street administration says the city’s budget surplus is even bigger than expected, with the city having on hand $255 million dollars extra. (Apparently, property taxes are being paid in this city, somewhere.)

So how’s council going to spend that $255 mil? Marian Tasco wants to give $10 million each to firefighters, cops and rec centers to fix up shit. Darrell Clarke wants to give some thought to helping the School District. All the council members want new gold decks for their houses. And Frank Rizzo wants “one of those guitars that are, like, double guitars.”

But, eh, c’mon. We (you, even!) could do a lot better. Rec centers? Education? Firefighters? Pshaw. Let’s use that $255 mil for projects that are actually useful.

More »

Perhaps EMTs Could Pose As Artists And Get Some New Ambulances

One could argue that arts are important to a city’s foundation. I guess I agree. You don’t get to be America’s Next Great City without such great art as the statue from Rocky III, the Geno’s sea of neon and trees covered in gum on South Street.

City Council and Mayor Street, though, don’t think they’ve done enough to foster artwork in the city, so they’ve proposed borrowing $150 million to foster the arts. Yay, good job, so forth, etc.

Right. You’re waiting for the catch. Don’t worry, it’s coming:

But the state agency that oversees the city’s finances warned that the city has already borrowed far too much. And city councilwoman Marion Tasco, an opponent, says more basic needs are going unmet: “We have not been able to maintain the infrastructure of fire stations, police stations, rec and ball fields.”

Well, hey, what’s a few closed down fire stations when there’s a dance troupe to be funded!

Mayor Street Wants to Borrow Millions For Local Arts [KYW 1060]
Sept. 22, 2005: America’s next great city? Really? Us?

Money Can’t Buy Me Love

It’s almost as if depression is a mental illness unrelated to how much money one has! Who knew!

Having Too Much [6 ABC]

Leftovers: Money For Nothing

• There are a slew of mayoral candidates are aren’t really “candidates” because they don’t yet want to adhere to the new strict fundraising guidelines: $2,500 for individuals and $10,000 for corporations. Still, since everyone knows they’re running for mayor (or planning to run), a lawsuit has been filed. Surely, this lawsuit will restore honesty and integrity to our political process! Or it will make lawyers some money. One of the two. [Inky]

• There’s a pillowfight in Love Park this Saturday. If you’re interested, get in on this before the city closes down the park, retools it to be unfriendly to pillowfighters and pisses off the huge ESPN Pillowfighting Games that happen to be taking place at the same time, thereby ruining any chances to have them here every year. [Phillyist]

• More children this year are dressing up for Easter. Unfortunately, they’re dressing up in suits and ties for mass, and not in some sort of fun bunny costumes. Alas. [KYW 1060]

• When they finally open slots parlors in Philadelphia — est. date of completion 2034 — who wants to be they’re old Atlantic City knockoffs that can’t accept the new $10 bill? In fact, if you want to bet that they’ll never have that or a similar problem, I’ll take you up on that offer. [AP/6 ABC]

• Finally, yes, that’s me making my debut in cartoon form in this week’s PW. Thanks to supercartoonist Jay Bevenour for realizing that, yes, if Curt Weldon were strangling a bunny and sitting on a puppy, I would be shocked and appalled. [PW]

Quickies: Slick Willie

• The group pairing with the union to bid for the Inquirer has President Clinton on the board of directors. Of course, he’s just a “senior advisor” and won’t be doing much, if anything, but, hey, perhaps they can get some hot interns out of the deal. Or, you know, ones that look like Monica Lewinsky. [New York Sun]

• Indicted officials getting money: It’s not just for Philadelphia City Council anymore! [Bucks County Courier Times]

• The player the Phillies traded Vicente Padilla for has been released. The good: New GM Pat Gillick isn’t afraid to admit mistakes. The bad: He might not have a clue what he’s doing. [Daily News]

• The U.S. debt clock will soon run out of room. “How about a government works project to build a new one?” says President Bush.

Wagering Dollars To Apples

I’m never quite sure what the attraction in bank robbing is anymore. Back in the 19th century, you could rustle up to the local bank, steal some cash with your six-shooter and spend your cash undetected until John Wayne caught you — provided he wasn’t portraying Genghis Khan at the time.

But now, there’s cameras, tagged money, tracking devices placed in bags and cops everywhere(ish) that can easily catch you. I’m sure people get away with bank robberies in America, but the risk/reward ratio just seems too great. You’re better off playing “red” in roulette, or getting your crime spree fix playing Grand Theft Auto. Or, you know, go into business.

Bank robberies are just too dangerous. Take yesterday, for instance. A robber robbed a bank in Northeast Philly, only to be caught a short time later in North Philly due to a tracking device. Same with another guy, who robbed a bank and hopped on a SEPTA bus… which, obviously, was pulled over a few blocks later. (One man did get away with a thousand bucks.)

The highlight of that first robbery in the Northeast was that the robber said he had a toxic chemical and he’d spill it all over if he didn’t get his cash. He got the cash, but the substance turned out to be apple juice.

Now, if it were prune juice, that’d be a toxic chemical.

Juiced up, he squeezes 6G from bank [Daily News]
The Conqueror [Registan.net]

Quickies: DARE to do drugs

• Philadelphia Will Do would like to congratulate Turner Middle School, which goes from grades six through eight, which so far this year has a city-high five drug and alcohol incidents. It’s a close race, though, as the K-4 (!) Lewis Elkin School is nipping at Turner’s heels with four. [Inky]

• How hot is Philly right now? (Not in a temperature sense, although we do all know now that it wasn’t cold enough for Ice Storm 2K6.) We’re the first city to get the new $10 bill! Whoo! Striking a blow against communism with one purchase of a Constitution Center ticket! Alexander Hamilton would be proud. [Early Word]

• The fan who ran out onto the field during an Eagles game to spread his mom’s ashes has gotten community service. He’s from Arizona, so for his service, he has to attend all eight regular season Arizona Cardinals games this year. [Inky]

• There’s now a store selling fireworks in Morrisville. However, of course, Pennsylvania residents can’t shop there legally. This makes so much sense it almost makes my head explode. [Bucks County Courier Times]