This Is My Favorite Missed Connection Ever

Friday night, my friend and I were walking along 18th, heading to Continental when you and your friends passed us. You asked me if I had a cigarette. Because I didn’t, I said, “No, I’m sorry.” Because I’m Asian, you said, “You’d probably have an egg roll though.” And then snickered to your friends like you believed you had said out loud what they all only wished they had the courage to utter. But it wasn’t brave to disparage someone you look down on. It was hurtful, and because it was hurtful it was common and unoriginal and pathetic. I didn’t think you were pretty before, and after that, you were just ugly. You make the world a worse place by not making it any better. Nobody will ever celebrate you.

Who ever would have thought annoying girls in Center City on Friday nights would make completely unfunny jokes?!

Drunk, racist brunette - m4w - 23 (18th & Walnut) [Craigslist]
Thanks, Chrissy

Today in Craigslist: Rick Mariano’s secret admirer?

There was a missed connection posted on Craigslist yesterday that I think is a call to everyone’s favorite city councilman:

At the US Court house today 3/6 at around 315pm - m4m

You were standing along the glass window when I came in. Caught you staring at me and when I was leaving as well. I started talking to someone in the plaza area outside the doors for awhile well within eye sight. If you see this get back to me. Would really like to talk with you.

Oh oh oh! That sounds like our buddy Rick Mariano, whose federal corruption trial began jury selection yesterday!

Looks like you’ve got a male admirer, Ricky. And, might I say, you probably should take him up on the offer. It could prepare you for prison if you’re found guilty.

USA v. Mariano [Inky]
At the US Court house today 3/6 at around 315pm - m4m [Craigslist]