We Totally Need One Of These In Philadelphia

Approximately seven hours away across the state in Erie, they’re having some trouble funding the International Magic Hall of Fame and Museum. Wow, really? Considering the only recent time I can think of a magician in the news is David Blaine failing to hold his breath for an hour or whatever after spending all that time in a bubble — seriously, did that actually happen, or did I dream it? — I guess the public just isn’t all that into magic.

But whatever. Further down in the article about the lack of a magic museum, there’s this line:

The county gave $25,000 to help start a School of Conjuring, which opened earlier this year.

Yeah, we totally need a school of conjuring in Philadelphia. Although here, instead of regular card tricks or whatever, they’d probably teach three card monte.

Plans For Pa. Magic Museum Stalling [CBS 3]
Related: Magician Ricky Jay on Arsenio in 1988

How To Make A Killing In Business

The Inquirer profiled Harry’s Occult Shop in Sunday’s paper, part of the paper’s attempt to reclaim the magic of the paper’s glory days by re-writing the same stories from its glory days. (Bada-bing!)

The Harry’s article (by Julie Stoiber) is actually pretty decent. Here’s what I learned: Apparently, these kinds of shops used to be everywhere. Awesome. One of Harry’s most prominent products is for “court case ritual,” so whenever big lawyers need to win cases, I guess they go there.

The article also contains this awesome quote from Harry’s worker Chac-Mool, regarding the store’s clientèle:

“With politicians, sometimes we have to take the stuff out where they’re parked,” he said. “They don’t want to be seen.”

Awesome. The idea that our politicians are buying white magic materials — instead of something sensible like putting a statue of Mary in their windows to prevent rain — makes me feel that the city’s gun violence problem will be solved any day now.

Of course, our politicians are probably using magic to try to end violence, as opposed to Shane Brown:

Retiree Mary Armour, 62, of North Philadelphia, is among the customers who turn to Harry’s staff of readers, priestesses and advisers. She wanted Double Jinx Remover Bath. Shane Brown, 32, an undertaker with a new business, was looking for something “to get the business to pick up and stay up.”

Are you kidding? People are dying to use Shane Brown’s services. Sorry, sorry.

For hexed or vexed, a store casts its spell [Inquirer]

Worse Prosecuting Through Chemistry

An ex-police chemist was arrested yesterday for stealing lots and lots of drugs from the lab. Whoops! The woman, Colleen Brubaker, was in charge of securing evidence in drug cases, and now lots and lots of cases have to be re-examined and possibly thrown out.

Oh, goodie.

And now lawyers for alleged drug dealers are using it to their advantage:

“There is no reason to believe that if Colleen Brubaker were a drug addict she would act differently than other drug addicts,” read a motion filed in [alleged coke dealer Terrence] Davis’ case.

The defender’s office asserts that police can no longer guarantee the “chain of custody” of the drug evidence and that Brubaker may have falsified information on the lab reports to cover up her addiction.

“The Prosecutor’s Office would somehow suggest that she was magically different than other addicts,” according to the court filing. “The chain of custody has been completely destroyed by the actions of Colleen Brubaker.”

Drugs! They’re magically delicious! I do kind of think she is magically different than other alleged addicts. I mean, what other ones get their drugs from the police?

A formula for chaos in courts [Inquirer]