#1 Job: Pa. Informant Paid To Have Sex

Among the many fine services the government provides us, nothing can possibly beat its role in preventing consenting adults from exchanging money for goods and services. Frankly, I get upset when goods and services that offend my sensibility are sold, and the government thankfully stops it so I can spend all my time being berated in comments sections.

Of course, sometimes there are casualties in this war on consent, and so sometimes the cops have to pay for an informant to have sex with prostitutes four times. That’s what happened in Lehigh County, where a judge has dismissed the case against Cha Chon of the Shiatsu Spa due to a informant making $180 for the state to pay for him to have sex with people.

The informant went to the police after going to the spa and becoming “appalled” that he was offered sex. He then went to the cops and agreed to be paid money to go back there and collect evidence in the form of sex. Quite appalling!

He wore a wire and the police laughed and laughed at him on tape. District Attorney and Saints backup QB Jamie Martin is shocked at the judge’s decision: “The tactics that were used are the same tactics that are used in making a controlled buy of narcotics, the only difference being the commodity being purchased.”

The defendant’s lawyer managed to dig up similar cases in Florida and right here in Philadelphia. Is there a signup sheet somewhere to become one of these informants?

Sex-buying tactics not ‘outrageous’, D.A. says [Inquirer]
Judge drops sex case as ‘outrageous’ [Morning Call]

Coyote Attack News Continues

NBC 10 has found more victims of the coyote that was loose in the NBC 10 viewing area.

The coyote, who roamed Lehigh County the day after Christmas, attacked three people and two dogs, making it a Big Important Story™. The animal tested positive for rabies after it was killed, so newly-revealed victim Marie Torquati — shown above demonstrating how she hit the coyote with a trash bag — has had eight rabies shots.

Will the coyote continue to haunt us from beyond the grave? Since this is a slow news week, I can most certainly say: Yes.

Coyote Tests Positive For Rabies In Attacks [NBC 10]
Wednesday: Wiley Coyote Killed With Anvil Dropped On Head

Wiley Coyote Killed With Anvil Dropped On Head

Up in Lehigh County — part of the NBC 10 viewing area! — a coyote was killed after attacking three people.

One of the men who saw the coyote was Joe Gerbino, whose German shepherd dog spotted the wild animal: “[My dog] knew this was not a dog. . . So I kept the garbage can lid on and forced it out of the yard. From there it just took off.” Wait, what? He kept the garbage can lid on what? Was the coyote in a garbage can? Did he use a garbage can lid as a shield (no doubt after practicing on the new Zelda game on his Nintendo Wii) and then drive the coyote out with the Master Sword?

Anyway, the coyote was killed — without a trial — for attacking three people and two dogs, although Gerbino said he was a little choked up at the whole thing: “I feel bad for the coyote, but there are kids in the neighborhood, and at the bus stop.”

Yes, the whole “won’t someone please think of the children” meme extends to coyotes, too.

Coyote Killed After Attacking Three People [NBC 10]