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An Eggcellent Crime

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Lansdale police say a couple — who I will now call “my new heroes” — went on an “18-month egging spree” that targeted about 400 people. NBC 10 reports:

Philip Fleck and his girlfriend Heather Darcy were out for revenge during an 18-month egging spree, police said.

The couple wanted to retaliate against friends for damages they said were inflicted upon them, but the couple also egged other people to draw suspicion away from them, according to police.

Weird thing is, if they egged around 400 people’s houses and cars… how much did they spend on eggs? You have to assume they used at least a half-dozen for every egging trip; that’s a couple hundred dollars. These people could have bought a Nintendo Wii for that kind of money.

Police: Couple Launched 18-Month Egging Spree [NBC 10]

Defendant Tries ‘Giant Penis’ Defense

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The lawyer for a Lansdale man accused of raping a 13-year-old girl wants to have a plaster cast made of his client’s penis to use as evidence at his trial that he didn’t commit the crime.

His defense lawyer, Marvin Gold of Hatboro, on Thursday explained his reasoning behind seeking the cast. He said that his client’s penis is apparently “extremely large.”

Gold also told the court — all of this really actually happened — “It occurs to me that, given my client’s size, it’s unusual there were no injuries.” It appears we’ve stumbled upon the “my penis is too large to commit rape” defense, a close cousin of the “I’m too pretty to rape someone” defense. Classy!

The defense lawyer for Ronald McDade asked last month how he should display his client’s genitals to the jury; after the judge acquiesced to a photo of his penis, the lawyer came up with the idea for a giant plaster dildo. Prison officials refused.

The prosecution is, naturally, opposed to the idea, saying that McDade’s “demand to provide the defendant privacy in prison so that he may… make a plaster cast of his erect penis is outrageous, offensive, and sensational. It makes a mockery of the criminal justice system and this court.” Hmm.

DA opposed plaster in rape case [The Intelligencer]