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Breaking: Harry Potter Book Ruined By Vandals

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KYW 1060 reports today a rash of vandals who are cutting out the final pages of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, the final book in the series. Well, okay, not so much of a rash of vandals, but, like, one copy of the book was missing a bunch of the final pages.

Melissa Antinoff from Mount Laurel, New Jersey, was all settled in, ready for bed about to finish ‘Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows’, when she realized several pages were missing: “Well, I could have cried, I got to page 706 and got to what I think is the top of 707 and the two sentences don’t match so I look down and it said 739.”

Frustrated to say the least, Mellisa says she thought of heading back to the bookstore, but it was almost 11 o’clock and she was sure they’d be closed. She had to wait until the morning, and she says she actually dreamed about the book.

I have to agree with Homer Simpson here: “Oh yea, this that fantasy book that even grownups like — broken, lonely grownups.”

Update: Somebody let me know if Will Bunch is kidding here; I’ve been trying to figure it out for a few days and am stumped.

Final Pages of Harry Potter Book Pull A Disappearing Act [KYW 1060]

City To Finally Have Place To Buy Sandwiches

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I really love when new businesses come to Philadelphia and someone does a story on it. A new chain restaurant (or whatever) coming to Philadelphia is probably a bit of a story, but reporting on it makes everything sound kind of like an advertisement.

Case in point: KYW 1060’s report on Potbelly Sandwich Works.

Choosing a place for lunch is about to become more difficult in Philadelphia, with the imminent appearance of another national sandwich shop chain.

“Potbelly Sandwich Works” is coming, next week to University City and next month to 12th and Walnut Streets.

It’s a sandwich chain with more than 150 stores in nine states, started in Chicago three decades ago as an antique shop that began selling toasted sandwiches.

That heritage, says spokeswoman Lindsey Mirmelstein, is evident today:

“You walk in and you feel you’re back in the ’70s or back sort of in an old, comfortable place. We have all antiques in our stores, no plastic. Everything is wood. We also have live, local music.”

Isn’t live music by definition local? Also, yes, it is always tough to decide what restaurant to go to. I can’t believe it’s now gotten harder. Dammit, Potbelly, you’ve just screwed up my lunch!

Chicago Sandwich Chain Bringing Stores to Philadelphia [KYW 1060]

John Street Beginning To Reach Milton-Like Levels

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Yesterday, the Inquirer reported John Street tried — and failed — to raise money for the anti-Michael Nutter ad campaign.

And as Street begins his final months in office, it’s clear he’s ripe for many moments of Milton-like inanity in the coming months, if his conversations with the press yesterday were any indication. KYW 1060’s Steve Tawa reports:

After a public event late Thursday morning, Mayor Street would not comment on the issue:

(Reporter #1:) “Mr. Mayor, may we talk to you about other issues?”

(Street:) “Not if the Inquirer’s around. I’ll talk later.”

(Reporter #2:) “I intend to be around, or someone for the Inquirer will.”

(Street:) “I will talk about it at another time.”

(Reporter #3:) “Before the election?”

(Street:) “Absolutely. I’ll let you know.”

To be honest, I don’t even know what the hell is going on here, except that John Street is attempting to simply not talk about anything if the most important media outlet in the city is there. Oh, and if the goings get tough, John Street gets going:

Moments later, he spoke to 1,600 people in the Convention Center, after which he refused again to comment to KYW, making his exit through a kitchen.

Mayor Refuses to Discuss Anti-Nutter Fundraising Calls [KYW 1060]

Tony Soprano, The Friendly Ghost

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The final season of The Sopranos begins Sunday night — what’s more Catholic than Easter and the mob? — and people are already speculating how the entire show’s going to end. Will Tony get killed? Will that snot-nosed twit A.J. get disemboweled? (Please.) Will Paulie Walnuts and Christopher get lost in the woods again? Will Steve Van Zandt learn how to act? (No.) Will the FBI finally arrest Tony?

KYW 1060’s John McDevitt went to the streets and asked people how they felt the show would end. Here’s the best response.

Another man who wants to see the series come back in the future, says Tony could be whacked, then brought back in spirit:

“A ghost maybe.”

(McDevitt): Ahh a ghost.

“Yeah, Tony’s ghost is coming to tell his son what to do.”

Or maybe Tony can start taking advice from a little green alien that appears only to him.

“Sopranos” Fans Brace For A Riveting Final Season [KYW 1060]

Accompanied With John Facenda Voiceover

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In a story about the Dateline sex sting that caught a Philadelphia bus driver, Xavier Van Erck, the director of operations for Perverted Justice — a group that helped with the sting — explains why the group does these things:

Von Erck said he hopes “predators will think three, four, five times before they talk to kids online.”

He also hopes they’ll get traffic on the twos and if they give 22 minutes, they can get the world.

N.J. sex sting nabs school-bus driver from Philly [Daily News]

Some Frank Reporting From KYW 1060

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As you may have heard, Ed Rendell wants to buy prescription drugs for the entire state. Or something like that. He wants to expand healthcare for the poor and needy. Or something like that. But before he does any of that, he wants to make drugs cheaper. Not for you or me, though. (We’re not that lucky.)

Rendell wants to streamline the current programs and save money on how much the state pays for prescription drugs. You might wonder why this hasn’t been done before. And KYW 1060’s David Madden explains why:

This plan has been proposed before but fell victim to budget negotiations (translation: lobbyist pressure). If the plan is implemented as proposed in October, it could save the state about $94 million a year.

Ohh, those wacky lobbyists. What won’t they think of next?

Pa. Seeks ‘Preferred Customer’ Rates from Drug Companies [KYW 1060]

KYW 1060 Dances Around ‘Really Bad Insult Word’

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KYW 1060’s Sonia Rincon has a story today about the rash of break-ins into unlocked cars in Doylestown. The car break-ins are blamed on (1) stupidity of people not locking their doors and (2) damned punk kids.

But of course. However, it’s not all fun and stolen stereos. This technique is called a bad word, too.

We can’t tell you what the kids call it. But let’s just say they’ve turned a really bad insult word into a verb to describe stealing valuables from people who leave their cars unlocked. Doylestown Township police saw two dozen of these incidents in the last five months and recently arrested three teens.

Chief Joseph White says there are probably more young thieves out there: “I actually believe that the word has spread amongst teenagers and young adults that way.”

I don’t know if I’ve ever heard a word spread exclusively through crime, Chief Joseph, but whatever you say. I love how KYW 1060 can hint at the word — badly, of course — and describe it as simply “a really bad insult word.” It’s like a quiz! Can you guess which “really bad insult word” kids call stealing from a car? Twating? Cunting? Motherfuckering? So many options!

The word in question for breaking into an unlocked car and stealing the radio or whatever is, unfortunately, most likely “niggering,” since there’s nothing more idiot suburban white kids like to do than throw around racial slurs like they’re footballs. I suppose “a really bad insult word” is an apt description, but I think I would have gone with something a little stronger.

Teens Blamed For Recent Car Break-Ins in Doylestown [KYW 1060]
[Photo by angelltsang, licensed via Creative Commons]

First Real Winter Arrives; Media Urges Panic

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Everybody into the cellar! There’s snow on the ground! Let’s close all the schools and live for the next two months on our huge rations of bread and milk!

Yes, we’ve finally had our first snowfall of the year, and our local media is reacting in a way not seen from journalists since the explosion of the Maine. As KYW 1060 put it, “Even walking was hazardous; many sidewalks were coated with ice.” (KYW also pulled a Daily News and had six people report the aforementioned story.)

NBC 10: headlined its report “Freezing Rain And Ice Causing Treacherous Conditions.” Treacherous! It’s like the freezing rain is an insurgent or something.

So what can we expect for the rest of the day aside from falling over each other on the sidewalks and having to cross treacherous terrain no matter what path we take? Philly Weather says it’ll change to rain in a few hours as it warms to the mid-30s and then back to snow in the evening. There are some problems: High wind gusts, lots and lots of freezing rain/sleet could cause power outages, etc. And, of course, the sidewalks.

Update, 10:30 a.m.: Nevermind, it was impossible trying to walk out there. Forget it, everybody, let’s panic!

Delaware Valley Hit With a Wintry Mix [KYW 1060]
Freezing Rain And Ice Causing Treacherous Conditions [NBC 10]
Ice Storm Warning Until 10 AM [Philly Weather]
Feb. 1: ‘Daily News’ Sics Entire Staff On Reid Sons Story

Right Idea, Wrong Execution

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No, you idiots! Body armor! They need body armor!

Haddonfield, NJ Kids Honor Troops With Heroic Pillowcases [KYW 1060]

Words To Live By

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Start of New Year is a Good Time for a Physical Examination [KYW 1060]