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Jan

20

Hitler’s Mom Has Got It Going On

012009hitlersmom.png Yes! Best headline ever! Not mine — my reference is pretty effing old — but the one at right, from a story on NBC 10: Hitler’s Mom Speaks Out, Defies Court Order.

Yeah, you guys know what this is about: Little Adolf Hitler Campbell and his 2 siblings were taken away by the authorities (possibly Tom Cruise) and placed in foster care.

Now, Hitler’s mother, Deborah Campbell, has spoken to NBC 10 in violation of a judge’s gag order. Not sure how much we can trust a woman who named her son “Adolf Hitler” — and her other kids JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell and Honszlynn Hinler [sic] Jeannie Campbell — but she says she and her husband were exemplary parents and that their children’s names are to blame for the state taking away her kids.

But the real money quote comes from little Adolf Hitler’s aunt, Jeanne Coverdale:

“What about tomorrow night when the President of the United States stands up and say, is forced to say, my name is Barack Hussein Obama. How’s that going to hit the world? I’m saying the one with the middle name he has, was a terrorist.”

I can’t wait ’til another historic day in our nation’s history, when a little boy named Adolf Hitler can overcome adversity and become president of the United States.
 
dmac | 3:23 PM | 4 Comments
New Jersey, Adolf Hitler Campbell, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell
 

Dec

16

Hitler Birthday Cakes Must Be Self-Prepared

121608hitler.jpg That little angel at right is a little boy from Warren County, N.J. Sadly, this little boy can’t get a birthday cake personalized with his name on it.

Why? Oh, yes, because his name is Adolf Hitler. The ShopRite in Greenwich Township isn’t going to put “Happy Birthday Adolf Hitler” on a cake.

The family did not want to write their own inscription on the cake — which they could have easily done — because that wouldn’t be exploiting their child to get attention to their laughably horrible cause. “ShopRite can’t even make a cake for a 3-year-old,” said Deborah Campbell, the 25-year-old mom of little ol’ Adolf.

What’s really great are the names of all the children:

JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell and Adolf Hitler Campbell.

It’s amazing that the child with the most normal name out of these three is the one named Adolf Hitler. Of course, I really do think “Aryan Nation” is a better name than “JoyceLynn.” But, really, who expected these parents to have taste?
 
dmac | 11:31 AM | 13 Comments
WTF, Adolf Hitler Campbell, Hitler, JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, ShopRite