A New Old Governor Sex Scandal

Former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer has been in the news a lot lately, you might’ve noticed, after paying $84 billion for a prostitute, who now is the #1 recording artist in the world.

How does Jim McGreevey get back in the news? While he didn’t pay for sex (that we know of, at least), he did cheat on his wife with a dude — more of a Republican thing to do, I know — and was the talk of the nation just four years ago. How do you top that? Oh, here we go: McGreevey’s former driver says he had a threesome with McGreevey and McGreevey’s wife! He says he only had sexual contact with the governor’s then girlfriend, Dina Matos, though.

It’s good to see McGreevey went the time-honored tradition of using power to get sex instead of paying for it.

Yeah, there you go: McGreevey is right back in the news and Eliot Spitzer is out of our minds forever. Or, rather, probably not, but, hey, here’s a new sex story!

I WAS MCG AND WIFE’S THREE-WAY SEX STUD: EX-DRIVER [New York Post]

McGreevey: I’m Worse Than Larry Craig, Idiots

Despite entering an Episcopalian seminary recently, noted gay ex-New Jersey governor/creepmeister Jim McGreevey hasn’t been in the news much lately. And how to rectify that? Why, by sending a letter about toilet senator Larry Craig to the Washington Post!

The opinion piece, which ran yesterday, talks about how hard it was to grow up gay (because of card catalogs, for some reason) and uses the special interest group phrase “gay American” again. And then he compares himself to Larry Craig in a way one might not expect.

I can only pray that Larry Craig and his loving family come to peace with his truth, whatever that may be. To those who judge him harshly, I ask that they fill their hearts with compassion and equanimity. The senator did not have a lover on the payroll, as I did; nor did he engage in sexual relations for money or use his office for unethical professional or personal gain.

Hmm, perhaps this is actually a Jim McGreevey impersonator writing in the Washington Post. It didn’t have a “Baba Booey” at the end of it, though, so probably not.

A Prayer for Larry Craig [Washington Post]
[Image via some unintentionally hilarious blog]

Dina Matos McGreevey’s Awesome Ass

Trentonian columnist Jeff Edelstein, on Dina Matos McGreevey:

And I don’t know if this overstepping bounds, but facts are facts: She’s got a commendable can. A bountiful bottom. A terrific tush.

You see, people? The coverage here of Kerri-Lee Halkett, Alycia Lane, Erin O’Hearn and Barbaro could have been a lot worse.

‘Jersey Girl’ Dina: What’s not to like? [Trentonian]

One Man’s Hatred Of McGreevey Goes Very Far

Okay, so if you follow the ironic news beat like I do, no doubt you’ve seen the news that Jim McGreevey is teaching an ethics course at Kean University in Jersey.

The former governor, who resigned due to being gay or something, also had many ethical lapses while governor, such as driving only 85 miles per hour on the road and wearing his seatbelt. Also he appointed his lover to chief guard of nuclear weapons.

Some people are upset McGreevey has the job, since working for Kean U. (for $17,500 a year) allows him to accrue pension credits₁.

Really, I have to leave the commentary here up to Camden Courier-Post commenter “proudgop,” which he addressed to Kean President Dawood Farahi:

Dear Dagwood,

Consider this to be my daughter’s withdrawal to attend Kean U in the fall.

Hey, honey, I know you wanted to attend the college with all your friends and the major you liked in September, but you really have to understand how much I hate Democrats! It’s okay, though, I pulled some strings and got you into Bob Jones University.

₁Defined as “something you accrue.”

McGreevey teaches ethics, leadership [Camden Courier-Post]

Leftovers: Swede To Cheat In Quest For Pointless Record

• Did you know the individual Frisbee time-aloft record is held by a Philadelphia-area resident? 16.72 seconds, set in Chester County in 1984. However, he may lose his record as a Swedish astronaut is going to attempt a new record while in space. Frankly, this seems like cheating to me. Can we get some dude on ‘roids — Justin Gatlin, maybe? — to return this record to its rightful country? [Inquirer]

• In Wednesday’s coverage of Vince Vaughn fingerbangee Mallory Lane (right), I mentioned she also had a piece in the San Antonio Express-Times. Well, they also did an interview and Lane had some different things to say. And her parents defended her! Aww, how cute. [San Antonio Express-Times via Gawker]

• After being rejected when he wanted to hang his ceremonial ex-governor’s portrait in the statehouse as part of his book promotion, it seems Jim McGreevey will finally get his wish. Richard Codey sulks, as he can’t go until McGreevey does. Hrumph. [AP/Camden Courier-Post]

• Apparently, women’s shoes found in a hotel are the break police need to catch the killer of four women found dead just outside Atlantic City last month. [Inquirer]

• The Phillies’ trade earlier this week for Bobby Livingston was nullified by MLB because, uh, you’re not allowed to pick someone up off waivers and immediately trade him for cash to another team. And the Devil Rays picked Livingston up off waivers and immediately traded him to the Phillies. (Uh, maybe.) Whoops. [Beerleaguer]

McGreevey: A Bi American?

On Larry King last night, Golan Cipel — the man identified as Jim McGreevey’s lover by the ex-governor himself — dropped a bombshell (okay, not really): Jim McGreevey’s not gay.

Well, that’s what Cipel says, at least. From the Associated Press:

“I think McGreevey had no choice. There was a sexual harassment lawsuit against him. And he didn’t know what to do, and his advisers told him, ‘come out first,’ and he would be perceived as the victim” and thereby gain control of the story, Cipel said.

While he said McGreevey did make sexual advances toward him on several occasions, Cipel said the former governor also frequently spoke about heterosexual encounters, including sex with prostitutes on trips to Germany and the Dominican Republic.

“I believe that Jim McGreevey is bisexual,” Cipel said.

Every state deserves to have a governor who talks about the prostitutes he’s boned in Germany and the Dominican.

Man Identified As Ex-Gov’s Lover: McGreevey’s Not Gay [AP/NBC 10]

Jim McGreevey, Masturbator

The tale of the nation’s favorite gay ex-governor gets messier this week with a story in yesterday’s Inquirer.

The paper nabs an interview with Golan Cipel, McGreevey’s alleged ex-lover. Alleged, of course, because Cipel continues to deny the whole thing. He also says that McGreevey called himself “the most powerful governor in the nation.”

Speaking from Israel, he spins the paper this yarn:

Cipel recalled another incident, which he said occurred while McGreevey was recuperating at home after breaking his leg in early 2002.

The former aide said he had taken paperwork to the governor and met with McGreevey, who was lying in bed. Once they were alone, Cipel said, McGreevey began to masturbate.

“He started to moan,” Cipel said, “and I told him, ‘You’re crazy. Your little baby is in here. Your wife and aide are in the kitchen.’ He didn’t move his face. He had this crazy look in his eye. He patted the bed and said, ‘Come sit next to me.’ I felt like I wanted to vomit.”

Dude, the man just broke his leg. The least you could have done for him was a little oral. Jerk.

Cipel: McGreevey assaulted me [Inquirer]

McGreevey Goes On National TV To Talk About Cheating On His Wife

Former New Jersey Gov. Jim McGreevey had his big interview with Oprah yesterday, and despite the secrecy asked by the producers, the Associated Press nabbed the big scoop: McGreevey admitted to having an affair with a man while his wife was in the hospital after the birth of their child.

McGreevey was on Oprah to promote his memoir, The Confession, which is due out on Sept. 17. (Conveniently, the episode of Oprah will air that day. Convergence!)

Here’s where it gets better: The man who McGreevey says he was having an affair with at the time of his wife’s hospitalization? If you said “Golan Cipel,” McGreevey’s alleged Israeli lover who he gave a high government post only to find Cipel couldn’t get his security clearance, then you were right!

No one’s positive on this, but while McGreevey was cheating on his wife while she was in the hospital, he also held up five banks, killed 220 puppies and ate a small child.

Former N.J. Gov. Tells Oprah of Affair [Metro]

Leftovers: Vote Early, Vote Often

• Gridskipper is having a “World’s Sexiest City” contest, and Philadelphia is up for the… World’s Most Hetero city! (Not necessarily anti-gay, it just means there’s a lot of man ‘n’ woman fuckin’ goin’ on.) I encourage you to vote for our fair city to win, although I suppose I’m a little dubious in its position among the nominees. (Take a guess why.) But no love for pro-gay, even with our “Get your history straight and your nightlife gay” ads? C’mon! [Gridskipper]

• Tonight marks the premiere of Monday Night Live on Comcast SportsNet, the day-after-football postgame show you might have heard of, but can’t really understand why. It’s hosted by the ubiquitous Michael Barkann. The co-host, though, is the real star: Fred Bibbo, the CSN security guard-turned-sports movie critic. This city. Awesome. [Inquirer, last item]

• Jim McGreevey’s memoir — The Confession — hits shelves Sept. 19, and he’s celebrating by taping an episode of Oprah tomorrow. Get ready for a really gay interview about a really gay book. Hey, it’s not even being used in the annoying pejorative sense this time! [AP/Inquirer]

• A group of activists decided to order at Geno’s in Spanish, and were turned down. The organizer’s rationale for the publicity stunt (which, uh, was a little late): “The point isn’t to communicate what it means to order food but to communicate ‘fuck your attitude’.” Indeed! [Philly IMC]

• The top two search terms currently on Philadelphia Will Do: “steve irwin jokes” and “steve irwin death jokes.” God bless America. And probably Australia, too.

Leftovers: A Gay American (And A Gay Talk Show Host)

• Guess who might be a co-host on Joan Rivers “queer version of The View“? That’s right, former New Jersey governor Jim McGreevey! We can’t wait for the episode about appointing your alleged lover to a position in Homeland Security. [NY Post]

• Terrell Owens hasn’t practiced with the Cowboys for 12 days. All together now: Hmmmm… [NBC 10 Eagles Blog]

• PATCO has begun a rollout of new high-speed line fare cards that are much easier than the old card system Patco used. SEPTA is not thinking of changing its “three chickens and a goat” fare system anytime soon. [KYW 1060]

• The 911 calls from the Brett Myers incident have been released; naturally, they contain this line from a caller: “What a stupid idiot.” [Inquirer]

• Thousands mobbed American Idol auditions at the Meadowlands today. Yep. Thousands of horsemen and horsewomen of the apocalypse. [AP/Camden Courier-Post]