Blogicized: Alien Iverson

• In case you were wondering, ESPN thinks Allen Iverson is from Mercury. Let’s hope Matt Cord starts announcing him as “a six-foot guard… from MERCURY!” in introductions at the Wachovia Center from now on. [The 700 Level]

• Much like he did in Philadelphia, Hugo Chávez has delivered his discounted oil to homes in Delaware. This is part of a new U.S. tactic to eventually have every citizen in America buy gas and oil from Chávez, therefore bankrupting Venezuela into democracy! [Delaware Watch]

• What you should have done for your Valentine’s Day date: heart-shaped pizza. Aww. [Asymptomatic]

• In the new Quinnipiac Poll, Ed Rendell got six touchdowns, six extra points and two field goals while Lynn Swann only got five touchdowns, four extra points and one two-point conversion. (He went for two late in a comeback attempt.) [America's Hometown]

Blogicized: Men of the Internet

• Guess what, single gal? Guys you meet on Craigslist might be 32 and living with their parents in New Jersey! Okay, I guess you might’ve already known that. [Apartment 2024]

• Alas. The Padres signed Mike Piazza to a one-year, $2 million deal to be their catcher. Although the Phillies missed out him, Padres fans are ecstatic about the possibility for the sexiest locker room ever. [Gaslamp Ball via Deadspin]

• An added bonus to Philadelphians getting oil from Hugo Chavez: It possibly pisses off Pat Robertson. [Badminton Stamps]

• The city has signed the Wireless Philadelphia contract, and Northeast Philly is going to be the guinea pig to make sure the system will work. The whole city is supposed to be done by 2007. So get ready to use your wireless laptop on the city’s system in about 2010. [Philly Future]

No blood for oil

Okay, I touched on this last week, but I don’t think I really expressed the sheer awesomeness of it: Low-income families are getting cheap oil from a crazy man who hates President Bush. (Is it a rule that all dissent-stifling leaders have to be borderline insane? I’m including Our Fearless Leader in this question, too.)

A discussion of how power corrupts aside, socialist Venezuelan president Hugo Chávez and his state-controlled oil company have shipped five million gallons of heating oil and lowered the price by 40 percent, in a deal brokered by a non-profit and Rep. Chaka Fattah.

A strange PR move for Chávez, especially since I’m not quite sure when Philadelphians will be voting in elections in South America, but hey, what do I know. Some on the right are angry about Joe Kennedy’s involvement, which makes sense — it’s like George P. Bush handing out pro-life signs at a rally.

But, come on, you can’t help but think this is so Philadelphia. It’s as if Police Commish Sylvester Johnson bought guns from the Iranians to combat the city’s rising murder rate. Come to think of it, that might not be so bad of an idea…

Venezuela’s discounted oil starts rolling into region [Inky]
Bridge over troubled oil? [Classical Values]
Jan. 27: Quickies: Captain Planet to the rescue!

Quickies: Captain Planet to the rescue!

• The other day there were three kids from University City High School who beat up a Drexel grad student for sport. And then, Wednesday, there was a melee during a University City-Southern girls’ basketball game. Seriously. Jesus. What is in the water in Schuylkill? Oh, right. [DN]

• The Inquirer goes all audio on us. Is it breaking news, a big story, audio from a press conference? No, it’s Tanya Barrientos and Karen Heller talking about the guilty pleasure of American Idol. There’s nothing guilty about watching Idol, sisters. [Inky]

• Fare thee well, Pennsauken Mart. You will always hold the title of “a crappier Franklin Mills” in my heart. [Inky]

• Rock on! Batty (and, well, entertaining) Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez is shipping five million gallons of oil to the Philadelphia area in a deal brokered by Chaka Fattah. Prediction: The Evening Bulletin will today (or Monday, at the latest) bash Fattah for dealing with Chavez. [Inky]