Business Uses Machine To Help With Efficiency

Now that they’ve created a robot that can fill prescriptions without mistakes, it is only a matter of time before the perfect robot is created and humans become slaves to the master robot race. Thanks a lot, Underwood-Memorial Hospital.

Pharmacy robot immune to error [Camden Courier-Post]

Natural Selection, I Guess

This sounds illegal.

Pa. Hospital To Phase Out Majority Of Its Patients [AP/CBS 3]

Losing 3 Fingers Does Not Make One Forget 9/11

When Marlton’s Zachary Buono lost three fingers on his left hand in a firecracker accident last April, he did what any red-, white- and blue-blooded American would do: Bucked up, wished his index and middle fingers goodbye and got an operation to replace his thumb with his big toe.

Bully for him. I know if I lost my fingers in a freak accident involving static electricity, an M-80 and my bedroom, the last thing I’d considering doing is being upbeat about it. But Buono is, and I wish him luck, although I don’t know if “it doesn’t look like a toe on a hand — it looks like a finger on a hand.” (Maybe.)

But the 14-year-old Buono isn’t only upbeat, he’s sympathetic to others:

[Doctor] Fuller described Buono as an “inspiration” to other patients who have watched his consistently positive attitude. During Monday’s appointment, Fuller said the boy even took time to express sadness over Sept. 11 victims.

I really like how the doctor says he “even took time.” I’ll imagine the conversation went something like this: “Excuse me, doc, but now’s the time in the appointment I’d like to set aside for the victims of the 9/11 attacks. Please join me in a moment of silence and then we can get back to my thumb.”

He lost a toe, but gained a thumb [Camden Courier Post]
Editor’s Note: This ranks among my favorite headlines of all time.

Leftovers: Phillies’ Season Officially Over

• Oh, yeah: Training camp began today. Finally. Who are the Phillies again? [Comcast SportsNet]

• A Berks diner has put up signs asking patrons to order in Pennsylvania Dutch. (Ba-zing!) Here’s an honest tip: “Coffee” is pronounced “koffee.” Y’know, in case you’re having trouble. [AP/Philly.com]

• WMMR: Tied with WDAS at the top of the Arbitron ratings in the key 25-to-54 demographic. And Preston & Steve are to thank. Among all listeners over 12, B101 and KYW 1060 are 1-2. But of course. [Inquirer]

• Hey, more Bulletin news! Herb Denenberg’s column today trots out an already-debunked myth about the New York Times in today’s paper. And calls them “stupid.” Ooh, be kind, guys. [Bulletin]

• Hospital patients are the victim of one medication mistake per day on average, says a study. If you need me, I’ll be covering myself in bubble wrap, thank you very much. [Inquirer]

Death, But At What Cost?

I know. Screw the dying, dude, they’re money wasting our money!

Care for dying: Too high a price? [Inquirer]

Penn People Are Total Downers

Recently, the Penn Medical school moved up to third in the nation in the U.S. News & World Report rankings. The school leapfrogged Duke (who it was tied with before) and Washington U. in St. Louis to move into that spot, behind just Harvard and Johns Hopkins.

Sure, these lists are usually pretty meaningless, but you still might smile and feel proud if you’re a hard-working, Penn med student, researcher, teacher, whatever. Unless you’re this guy:

A Penn clinical professor who spoke on the condition of anonymity said that the recognition might attract sicker patients who overwhelm the system.

“That’s my initial instinct: ‘Oh god, another award.’ We don’t need any more people knocking on our door,” he said.

Ohh, I feel so bad for you, professor. So bad.

Medical School moves up to third in nation [Daily Pennsylvanian]
Photo by Sarah Baker

Finally, Some Philadelphia Praise With Actual Evidence

In the past few months, Philadelphia has been named America’s Next Great City and Madrid USA &c., &c.

The praise has always made this Philadelphia native happy, confused, skeptical. Why were we suddenly the hot city? Because magazines were saying it?

But, now, doctors from Sweden have finally found some Philadelphia praise that doesn’t make us skeptical at all:

In cities such as Philadelphia, where 317 people have been shot during the first 2-1/2 months of this year, gunshot wounds are so common that trauma surgeons here are considered global experts, often pioneering techniques to save lives.

Gunshot Wound Capital of the World! Now that’s a title we can really be proud of. Suck it, Detroit!

Swedish doctors get Phila. lesson in gun wounds [Inky]
Sept. 22, 2005: America’s next great city? Really? Us?
Tuesday: Filadelfia, Lo Mejor Cuidad En Todos Los Estados Unidos!

Blogicized: Naked dude in Rittenhouse!

• I’ll simply quote some of this Livejournal post: “Does anyone know what was up with the naked guy spinning around rittenhouse square this morning? I was walking up Locust street this morning on my way to work and as I reached 18th I saw a naked guy with a large tree branch with a sheet tied to it wedged between his legs.” [Livejournal Philadelphia]

• Of course, you knew that one day one of the people in Jay Bevenour’s weekly cartoon would post about it on her blog. [Mommy Grows Up]

• Congratulations, Phillies fans! We couldn’t even win the “most miserable baseball franchise” award, placing fourth. Ugh, you win one, you lose over 100. It happens. [The 700 Level]

• While we here in Philadelphia have some of the finest hospitals, our ambulances? Not so much fine. Fortunately, if you’re like me, you’re within stumbling distance to about 15 hospitals. Phew. [Politics Philly]

• The Committee of Seventy is looking for people to run for office. Hey, can Milton Street sign up? [Young Philly Politics]