Utley To Yankees Fans: ‘Boo? Fuck You!’

Chase Utley was booed at the home run derby last night, and fortunately was caught on the mike telling Yankees fans what he felt. “Go fuck yourself” might have been a better thing to say, but we’ll have to settle with what he said. (Because we can’t handle the word fuck in print, the Daily News for some reason prints “(bleep) you.” Seriously, guys?)

If you watched last night’s home run derby, you no doubt saw ex-drug addict Josh Hamilton hit 28 homers in the first round. Hamilton got off drugs in part by finding Jesus. This led 700-time Sportswriter of the Year Rick Reilly to say, “It’s a lousy night to be an atheist.” Since Hamilton is Christian, was it also a bad night to be a Muslim or Jew? (The difference is: If Reilly had said, “This is the worst night for Jews since Kristallnacht,” he would have been fired.)

Reilly is, of course, correct: God rarely interferes in human events anymore, but he does every once in a while help a Christian in the early rounds of a home-run hitting contest or two. Every once in a while he even helps them break storied records, like Bobby Abreu’s historic total of 24, which has stood for an immeasurable amount of time (three years). I’ve always thought it was kind of weird that God interferes in exhibition contests (that aren’t even a baseball game) and not, say, the postseason, but who am I to question? He’s God.

Once you get to the finals, though, you’re on your own. Hamilton hit just three homers in the final round and lost to Justin Morneau, who was promptly called the wrong name. But, ha, ha, Chase Utley cursed on live TV before the game, which really gives a way better high than heroin.