Pennsylvania Justice

A Johnstown man was sentenced Tuesday for running an illegal taxi service. [...] A judge sentenced him to 15 months probation and community service. He will also have to pay $900 in fines and is not allowed to operate a cab or even wear a hat that says “Taxi Cab.”

Johnstown Man Sentenced For Running Illegal Taxi Service [WJAC-TV]

Awesome Hats Not Out Until Dec.

The incredibly awesome hats (above) that some Phillies and Rays players were wearing during both days of Game 5 of the World Series are finally up for sale on the Phillies website; they’re made by New Era and come two sizes. They’re $40, which sounds like a lot but isn’t too horrible. I mean, it’s not $50.

But, a caveat: They’re not shipping ’til December! Way to drop the ball, major league baseball. We need these hats out right now, immediately, so we can wear them to Eagles games in the frigid cold and do our E-A-G-L-E-S, PHILLIES! chants and not lose our ears to frostbite.

Phillies Still Out In Front

The Fightins (the blog, not the team) have a slideshow of Phillies announcer Gary Matthews’ different hats. (Yes, it’s still too hot for anyone to make any real news.) The Phillies lost to the Marlins last night, 5-4, but are still three up in the division. It would be nice to take the next 2 games, though.

Meanwhile, the Sports Complex has the most serious article ever written and it’s about Phillies’ announcers Gary Matthews and Tom McCarthy, who do innings 4 and 5: “I’m going to argue that the negative feelings that seemingly all of Philly has towards the two is 1. wrong and 2. shortsighted…. while most of the comments there did seem to trend towards ambivalence, still I’ve yet to find anyone outside of my immediate social circle who speaks of those two with high praise.”

Phillies play the Marlins again tonight at 7 with Cole Hamels pitching. A win and they’re 40-27 and four games up in the NL East. Exciting!

The Best Political Headgear Since The Stovepipe Hat

Yesterday, I took a look at how some Delaware residents didn’t even know there was a primary going on yesterday. And, thanks to your 8 percent turnout, Republicans, here’s who you have running for Senate:

That’s Jan Ting, a Temple law professor who eeked out a victory Tuesday, dressed in what I hope he’ll be wearing every day on the Senate floor if he pulls out the upset win in the general election.

Ting ekes out win in Senate primary [The News-Journal]
Protruding Proboscises [Billiken's Bluff]
Yesterday: Del. Primary Is Democracy In Action!

You, Too, Can Get Terrell Owens’ Cup

It used to be, you had to be a professional athlete to get a professional athlete’s cup. I’m not quite sure why you’d want a pro athlete’s cup, but some people are just really hardcore.

But, now, thanks to his official website, you can indeed get Terrell Owens’ cup, as well as his hat and an MP3 of his rap about making it to the Pro Bowl next year. Actually, you get four of T.O.’s cups, and five downloads of his MP3, which — since it’s an MP3 — probably doesn’t have any crippling DRM on it.

Oh, and this deal costs $59. Fifty-nine bucks for a hat, four cups, and an MP3 that you can download five times. (Not sure why you need to download it more than once, though.) The hat, though, is exclusive to T.O. Fan Club members — oh, yes, this is what this deal is for, a membership to Owens’ fan club — and you do also get this bonus:

You will be automatically entered in “Meet and Greet” and have a chance to win two (2) round-trip tickets to “BIG D” to see me “live” in action, as well as meet me after the game.

I must say, I’m a little confused why “live” is in quotes. It seems like you’ll be watching the game on television and then meeting T.O. outside the locker room after the game. But, hey, you do get four cups!

Fan Club Package [Official Store of Terrell Owens]
Join Terrell Owens’ Special Club [Deadspin]

Copy Cats [PW]
March 20: Well, he’s better than Shaq at least

Weeding through bad intros

I said early in the year that I wanted to keep a running tab on overwritten leads in the local papers. Apparently we’ve been doing pretty well so far this year, as there haven’t been too many stories with awful, awful leads.

As such, I’m expanding the category (at least for now), just so I can include this story about a girl who found pot in her hat. The AP story out of Syracuse concerns a girl, six, who opened her locker to find 20 bags of marijuana in her hat. To be fair, the bags contain a “leafy substands [police] suspect is marjiuana,” so who knows what’s in there.

So there’s the story. Now what’s the lead? None other than this:

SYRACUSE, N.Y. — It’s not a case of Cat in the Hat – but pot in the hat.

Get it! There was pot found in a hat, so the writer replaced cat with pot and — bingo! — instant journalism!

Pot in Student’s Hat [AP via 6 ABC]
Jan. 11: Why we’re all jealous of Smarty Jones