New Gang To Terrorize Military Impostors

Before ex-Atlantic City mayor Bob Levy went into hiding, he was under fire for claiming to be a Green Beret when he wasn’t, in fact, a Green Beret. Apparently people who actually earn roles in the Green Berets or certain medals get a little pissy when people who didn’t win the Medal of Honor or whatever claim they did.

Somehow, saying you won a military medal and didn’t can actually get you sent to prison! (Because it’s not like we have freedom of speech to lie in this country or anything, unless you’re in government. Levy, incidentally, is under investigation he received military benefits he wasn’t eligible for.) And, apparently, if you mess with the Green Berets, you’re going to get shot or something:

“I told him he would have been wiser to mess with the Bloods or the Crips. I told him he was messing with the baddest gang in all the world. Our colors are forest green and olive drab. We are the men of the U.S. Army’s Special Forces.”

Are you kidding me? The Green Berets are a badder gang than the Cavity Creeps? I mean, sure, they fight on the front lines of war or whatever, but do they make holes in your teeth?

On a side note, I bet if the Green Berets began trafficking drugs like other gangs, they’d have the best weed ever. I mean, they’re the Green Berets.

How mayor of A.C. was exposed [Inquirer]

Jersey Town To Stop Gangs With Elbow Grease, Pluck

Remember the days when gangs were friendly little scamps who knew how to tap dance, and they only play fought with play knives and had simple-to-remember names like “Jets” and “Sharks” that made them seem more like a sports team or social club than a gang? Well, you probably don’t, since I don’t think those days only existed in high school plays. (See also: Guys and Dolls.)

Well, now our gangs aren’t like they were in the movies and they’re taking over streetcorners and probably full of illegal immigrants and owned by a company in Dubai, too. One such town is Pemberton Township, New Jersey, which has a school district with the initials PTSD. (Heh.) While gangs aren’t on streetcorners there, cops say, they are in homes and there have been four shootings this year.

And, so, the township has turned to a 74-year-old woman to organize ideas to get rid of gangs (really) since th township really can’t do anything itself (emphasis mine):

The key to fighting back, law enforcement and gang experts say, is creating activities and opportunities within the community for young people who might be drawn to gang activity. That may be ideal, but [Pemberton Township Committeeman Tom] Inge said the town’s financial situation leaves it with a difficult reality.

The township can’t even afford to conduct a meeting at Burlington County College to address the growing problem, Inge said. They’re looking for funds for that and extra money Igne thinks the township needs to provide better safety and security for this summer’s outdoor community events.

The township plans to wait until the middle of spring when it’s warm and hold a meeting in the parking lot of a Wawa.

Pemberton Twp. residents take action on gangs [Camden Courier-Post]

Local Gangs Infiltrate Modell’s

Yesterday, teachers in Neshaminy got a crash course in — what else? — how to spot gang members. But of course.

And not just that, but, according to New Jersey St. Police Lt. Edwin Torres, even if a kid is pretending to be in a gang, the real gang members could kill him if they find out. (And it has happened, he says.)

Anyway, the number one sign of gang members (emphasis mine):

An obsession with certain colors or sports teams — via jerseys — without liking the team. For instance, members of the Crips gang wear Colorado Rockies shirts, because they say CR stands for Crips Rule. They don’t actually care for the baseball team.

And if you see someone wearing a Cincinnati Reds jersey, he’s a communist.

Teachers learn to spot signs of gangs [Bucks County Courier Times]

Police Nab Fuzzy, Chains, Scary Movie, Tommy Trash, Etc.

Attorney general Tom Corbett and Bucks County DA Diane Gibbons announced arlier today that law enforcement had arrested “as many as 15″ (?) suspected members of a crystal meth ring operating in Bucks Co. and Philly.

The operation was called “Breed on a Wire.” (Slamming head against desk.) Huzzah for breaking up the meth ring, but the best part of the press release is the nicknames of some of the suspected Breed members, who operated it. For example:

• John “Shameless” Kovacs
• John “Junior” Napoli
• Christopher “Slam” Quattrocchi
• James “Coffin” Fostinis
• Thomas “Tommy Trash”/”Crypt Keeper” Conner
• Kenneth “Chains” Steinmuller
• Thomas “Fuzzy” Heilman
• Frederick “Panhead Fred” Freehoff
• Charles “Ruthless” Kulow
• Bridget “Scary Movie” Dale
• James “Nazi Jimmy” Coyle Jr.
• Robert “Molly” Traverse
• David Freinier

Frinier was most likely ostracized from the fellow accused for not having a ridiculous nickname like “Fuzzy” or “Chains” or “D-Mac.”

But that’s not all! There’s also some very over-the-top details in the press release. For example, police intercepted a phone call from Napoli regarding the cops investigating him where he said “maybe someone will rape their mothers with a hot curling iron.” (Yuk, yuk.) Oh, and Steinmuller had a shrine to Hitler in his residence.

We can only imagine what “Nazi Jimmy” had in his apartment.

Full release after the jump.

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Trenton Makes Grillz, Gangs Take

According to an article in the Inquirer today, Trenton ranks somewhere between Fallujah and Baghdad in terms of lawlessness. The capital of New Jersey — yes, really, it’s the capital — has been overrun with gang wars, and there have been death threats to the mayor and the police director.

You won’t find that in Harrisburg. (Well, maybe. I don’t think I’ve ever actually been there.) Either way, if there’s one state that’s going to have its capital overrun by gang violence, it’s going to be New Jersey.

The fighting isn’t due to actual wars between gangs, but between rival sets of members of the Bloods over perceived slights. The other gangs — the Latin Kings and the Crips — had head members arrested last year and have pretty much been wiped out in the city.

Trenton has almost 1,000 gang members, nearly all of them Bloods. Although there is an obvious downside to the gang warfare, there is an upside for some shop owners:

Mike Bonilla, owner of Capitol Jewelry downtown, said he would welcome a more visible police presence to reassure customers who have begun shopping outside the city.

He said his business from the general public had dropped 40 percent. But a steady stream of gangsters now shops in his store, buying diamond earrings and gold dental caps called “grillz.”

Silly Inquirer. Don’t they know it’s spelled “gangsta”? They coulda even put it in quotes!

Gangs’ terror runs deep in Trenton

Quickies: Now with extra snark!

• Congratulations to the Daily News‘ Jenice Armstrong, who managed to get the artist who recorded “Gold Digger” — that’d be Kanye West — incorrect in in the first sentence of her story yesterday. And congrats to the DN staff, who even put a photo of Ludacris with the story. [DN]

• Jessica Pressler and Phillymag discover the secret to a No. 1 bestseller: Write boring columns that your colleagues don’t like, get a cute doggy, write book about him. Instant profit! [Phillymag]

• Hey, how about those Phillies! In their first exhibition game, the Fightins beat the Yankees, 6-3. [AP/Yahoo!]

• Look out, Bucks County: The Bloods are coming! From Trenton! [Bucks County Courier Times]