The Phillies Are Totally Going To Lose To Florida State

Yes! The Phillies spring training season officially begins tonight, as the Phillies play their first game after a few weeks of practice. Although the regulars won’t play much, it’ll be nice to hear that Ryan Howard, Chase Utley, Jimmy Rollins and the gang were hustling out there in something where score is kept, and… oh, what’s that? They’re playing Florida State? (At right: Florida State golf balls.) Oh, that can’t be good.

It’s not uncommon for good college teams to play major league clubs in exhibition games before the season starts. But with pretty much everyone jacked up about the local nine this season, it’d be just like the Phillies — or, really, any Philadelphia team — to drop the first exhibition game to a college team. Dammit. They’re totally going to do that. They’re totally going to lose to this stupid college team and everyone’s going to be deflated immediately, even though it doesn’t matter.

Erhm. I mean: Go Phils. Lose and we’re through with you. Hey, I know it’s early, but we ain’t going to take losing to a college team. Especially since the Flyers and Sixers would probably lose to a couple of ‘em.

Phillies ready to tackle Seminoles [Daily News]