Drexel’s Non-Discriminating Elevator

As you can tell from this sign on an elevator at a Drexel parking garage at 34th and Market, fat people are also allowed to ride.

Analyst: Fat People Pinch Pennies

Bensalem-based clothes retailer Charming Shoppes — owner of Layne Bryant and Fashion Bug, the runner-up to Dress Barn in the Worst Clothing Store Name Compeition — has sued its “activist” shareholders.

Whatever. What caught my eye was this comment from Erin Moloney, senior vice president of Merriman, Curhan, Ford & Co. in Portland, Ore., whoever that is. Moloney told the Inquirer the plus-size clothing chain could face problems:

“It’s going to take some time for them to fix the business,” said Moloney, adding that plus-size and discount consumers typically cut back on spending early in an economic crunch.

Okay, so discount customers have less money, so they have less money to spend during a recession (or whatever term you’d like to call it). And I guess fat people are poorer than fit people, plus they’re spending all that money on diet pills.

So, uh, looks like Forman Mills is set to have a huge next couple of years, with our tightening pockets and expanding waistlines. Ditto Jo-Mar. Does that one in Kenzo still exist?

Charming Shoppes sues activist shareholders [Inquirer]

Pa., N.J. Are Fat, But You Should See The Other Guy

Break out the standard stock footage of fat people’s jiggling bellies and giant calves, some study or magazine or something released a list of “fattest states.”

Although Philly was at one time America’s fattest city, we’ve gotten better in recent years in that pointless Men’s Health ranking, apparently. And in a report released by “an obesity watchdog group,” Pennsylvania and New Jersey are fat, but not as fat as some people. Nearly one in four adults in Pennsylvania are “obese,” and 13 percent of kids.

Colorado is leanest with a 17 percent obesity rate, while 30 percent of Mississippi residents are fat, most of them from drinking whole kegs of beer and eating entire pigs while tailgaiting at college football games or something. Oh, and overall poor people were the fattest, because the rich in this country can afford gastric bypass surgery, or don’t eat Wendy’s 10 times a week.

Pa., NJ In Middle of Pack Among Fattest States [KYW 1060]

N.J. Fitness Czar Comes Too Late For Tony Soprano

New Jersey’s health commissioner recently formed the Office of Nutrition and Fitness, hoping to add yet another level of bureaucracy in the state. (KYW 1060’s David Madden even reported the move “[s]ounds like more bureaucracy.”)

But Health Commish Fred Jacobs said the move was recommended by a state panel that studied obesity. Apparently, the new fitness czar is going to tell kids to eat better and exercise more. Then the kids are going to see about 45 ads on TV for Xbox 360 and sugary cereals and continue to eat on the couch.

He also wants to do this:

Jacobs is also considering a call to include a child’s body mass index (”BMI”) number on his or her report card, but he admits there would be legal, social, and privacy concerns to address first.

Yeah, I am sure that is going to go over real well.

NJ Health Commissioner Forms State Fitness Office [KYW 1060]

I’ll tell you what you can do with your ‘disputes’

Hey, Mr. “Expert,” how about you shut your cakehole.

Expert Disputes Findings of “Fat Tolerance” Survey