Escalators A Threat To Our Nation’s Breasts

As part of Philadelphia Will Do’s commitment to bringing you the latest in breast news (as well continuing to have an “obsession with sex,” as Phillymag put it), I present to you the intro to today’s Daily Candy newsletter:

If you’re a woman, odds are you’ve got some breast issues. ¶ You may love them, you may hate them, you may get them caught in escalators and car doors.

Okay, car doors… maybe. (An endowed friend has told me, “Umm, no.”) But escalators? How would that even work? You’d have to fall and then have them be caught under the teeth (or whatever) at the top of bottom. And that’d be, like, a really painful, bloody event. So if that happened a lot you’d think it’d be a national crisis with Dateline specials and protests and maybe even a national task force.

Clearly, I’m thinking about this too much. But, hey, I gotta keep up the image.

Bra Miracle [Daily Candy]