Breaking: Britney, K-Fed Break Up; Also Pittsburgh-Area Blacks Denied Chance To Vote

Big, breaking news that caused CNN.com to break out the giant red banner: Britney Spears has filed for divorce from Kevin Federline. Unbelievable, heartbreaking news. (Although she’s back on the market now, boys! And, hey, K-Fed is, too, ladies!)

Oh, also, Salon reported that some black voters weren’t able to cast their votes or something near Pittsburgh. But, whatever: Brit + K-Fed are done! Wow!

Pennsylvania: Faulty machines, closed polls in black neighborhoods [Salon]
Britney Spears Files For Divorce [TMZ.com]

Allentown Technophobe Does His Duty As A Citizen In The Only Way He Knows How

A man in Allentown decided fuck this newfangled electronic voting shit and decided to go nuts on an electronic voting machine:

A man entered an Allentown polling site, signed in and proceeded to smash one of the electronic voting machines with a metal cat paperweight, poll volunteers said.

Michael Young, 43, of 375 Auburn St., will be charged with felony criminal mischief and tampering with voting machines, according to Ronald Manescu, chief of investigations for Allentown police.

Police gave no motive, but a source said Young, a registered Independent, believed Republicans had conspired to win the election by using electronic ballots. This is the first time electronic machines are being widely used in a Pennsylvania general election.

“He smashed it with the cat’s ears,” said volunteer Jim Govostis, who watched the incident unfold at Raker Center, a nursing home owned by Good Shepherd, a little before 1 p.m. [...]

Volunteer Shirley Rossetti said Young never spoke as he smashed the screen. “He did a job on it, didn’t he?” she said. “It’s frightening, because in this day and age, you just never know.”

You never know, indeed. American hero, that Michael Young. And his cat.

Voter smashes touch-screen machine in Allentown [Allentown Morning Call]

Fun With Funny Pictures, Part II

Rendell: C’mon, let’s go get some cheesesteaks.

Gore: Ah, I dunno, Ed…
Rendell: Come on. We’ll go to Abner’s, get some cheesesteaks, then relax at Club Wizzards.
Gore: You’re touching my arm.
Rendell: Cheesesteaks and strippers, Al. Cheesesteaks and strippers.
Gore: Okay, but I get to drive my electric car and you have to offset your carbon emissions.
Rendell: Deal. Let’s go.

Yesterday: Fun With Funny Pictures

Santorum Closer Than Once Thought?

Writing on National Review’s blog, Kathryn Jean-Lopez says our pal Ricky isn’t so far behind:

I’m told by a good, albeit Republican, source that Gov. Rendell’s latest internals have Santorum only 5 behind. I’m told he had Santorum at 9 on Friday and 17 three weeks ago. Contrary to conventional wisdom, this race is in play.

Take this with a grain of salt, etc., as this is sort of counter to every public poll and could just be a conservative trying to rally the base. On the other hand, if you’re planning on voting for Casey, you better get out there lest we have six more years of the unintentionally amusing senator.

Encouraging News [The Corner]

GOP’s Dirty Tricks Will Surely Ignite The East Coast

In case you were wondering, this whole Democratic wave of victory hasn’t made our favorite democrat any happier about the election. Phew.

The coming brushfire [Attytood]

Election Day Special

Finally. After what seems like 45 months of endless annoying campaigning by pretty much every single candidate except Allyson Schwartz, it is election day.

This means Chevy will be singlehandedly supporting the television industry for the next few weeks since the only other ad on recently besides election ads is that damned “This is our Country” song. Eventually, Christmastime will roll around and things will return to normal. (At least in terms of commercials.)

Anyway, Philadelphia Will Do will be running this whole election thing into the ground the rest of the day, with our Election Day Special! (As well as the usual.) If anyone has a photo of a puppy voting, that’d, like, be perfect for today, so please let me know.

It’s Election Day 2006 [KYW 1060]

Only One Day Until All Of This Is Over

Only one day until the election. Which means we only have to suffer through one more day of stupid ads, signs all over the city and robot phone calls to our landlines. (Some of us only have cell phones. Ha!)

That’s not to say that tomorrow will be a cakewalk:

Okay, only one day until we’ll all spend our day scared of a stray shot from Deadeye Dick whizzing by our heads. But after that, freedom!

Cheney Going Hunting On Election Day [NBC 10]