He Didn’t Fight; The Law Won

A man from West Philly pled guilty yesterday to being a lookout for a robbery of an 83-year-old man in a Gallery bathroom. (See? Yet another reason why you use the bathrooms in Market East Station, and not in the Gallery. The main reason, which should be enough anyway, is that the bathrooms in Market East are about 100,000 times nicer.)

Here’s the fun part of the story, though (which I must admit was pointed out by a Philly.com commenter):

Peruto was arrested Sept. 13 when he bolted from a West Philadelphia rowhouse, apparently believing that police officers serving bench warrants nearby were after him. He immediately confessed, authorities said

Well, I guess nobody expected the guy who helped rob an 83-year-old would be brave. I like to look at it another way, though: People are always talking about snitching, and this dude did it on himself! Why aren’t politicians having press conferences praising him?

W. Phila. man admits being ‘lookout’ in Market East robbery [Inquirer]
Anybody have any idea why lookout is in quotes in this headline?

Man Allegedly Likes Razors, Cars

A man in Quakertown accused of stealing exactly $1,076 in razorblades and OTC painkillers last month was let out on bail — and promptly stole a car from a gas station moments after being released, authorities say.

Donald C. Strohm Jr. was free on unsecured bail and at press time he hadn’t been caught yet, says the Courier-Times. The article helpfully notes, “Violating any conditions of his release — which would include stealing a car — would compel Strohm to pay bail or face incarceration.”

Police: Suspect gets bail, steals car [Bucks County Courier Times]

Half-Dime Bags Taken Off Streets

The Daily News‘ top story online today is the arrest of a rather unremarkable criminal; Wednesday night, he went the wrong way down a one-way street, two cops stopped him and they found some marijuana and a gun. Turns out he’s also due in court on Jan. 18 (aggravated assault) andJan. 24 (disorderly conduct, resisting arrest) from November incidents.

But whatever. Here’s the interesting part.

The traffic violation couldn’t have come at a worse time. Russel - who was convicted on a felony gun possession charge in 2003 - was packing a stolen gun, as well as seven baggies containing $35 worth of marijuana, police said.

Thirty-five dollars worth of marijuana? So… $5 bags? Geeze, this guy didn’t even have dime bags. He probably did more people driving the wrong way down the street.