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Look How Awesome Phillymag Used To Be

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I got Phillymag’s December issue, the one with the top 100 moments in the last 100 years, in the mail yesterday. The above is included in their “misses” section, where the magazine chronicles all the horrible failures it has made in the past 100 years. (It’s by far the best part of the issue.)

Above: Several Phillymag drug articles, which they claim to want to take back. Personally, what seems most embarrassing is writing a feature story about crack in 1994. That’s four years after Bugs Bunny, Garfield and the cartoon version of Alf successfully ended the crack panic with Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue. Geeze.

Crack, Weed, Nicotine Make Local News

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Oh, so apparently this story is gaining a lot of traction: A 7-year-old in Trenton was found with crack in school; his 10-year-old sister turned him in. This was a little different than the usual minuscule amount kids manage to steal from idiot parents and bring into school for show and tell. Our little 7-year-old had seventy grams of cocaine.

The kid won’t be punished — hooray! — but his parents have been arrested on drug charges and endangering the welfare of a child. A commenter on Action News‘ website plainly states: “does anyone who has made it out of the inner city care enough 2 put their successes aside 2 mentor 1 child 2day honestly it does no good 4 the white community 2 step up 4obvious reasons 2 numerous 2 list as a community both blk n wht n other we r in trouble.” Uh, yes.

The Eagles’ Mike Patterson was recently charged with possession of a drug of a less dangerous nature, i.e. marijuana, reefer, pot, ganja, cannabis and about 150 other stupid names. The Daily News‘ John Smallwood goes and says he shouldn’t be smoking pot because of Andy Reid’s sons!

Considering his family’s ordeal, it would be difficult for Reid to simply dismiss Patterson’s actions and let them drift away. For Reid to do nothing to Patterson would be a tacit acknowledgment that drug use isn’t that big a deal, and really, how can he possibly do that? Yet, if Reid hands down an overly harsh penalty on Patterson, would it be viewed as him allowing his personal issues to influence his professional duties?

Sigh. Meanwhile, Philly Edge points to a debate about a legal drug: Some snooty teenagers in Bensalem want to take away our right to smoke in parks and playgrounds! If not the suburbs, there’s nowhere else to smoke! The kids are part of the Extreme Service and Intergenerational Training Experience, and we all know how much extreme power that group has. Guess we’ll have to be content to smoke elsewhere. Who knew you were even allowed to smoke at a playground anyway?