Local Flasher Leads Colorful Life (Duh)

Ahh, yes. The flasher. Yesterday, the son of Judge Lisa Richette was arrested for allegedly punching, uh, Judge Lisa Richette. NBC 10’s Monique Braxton went to Larry Richette’s home in G-Ho and asked him for comment. He responded, of course, by opening up his robe and showing his ding-a-ling.

The Inquirer’s Joseph Slobodzian fleshes out the story today, adding crucial details, including that he used to be an editor at City Paper. (Perhaps as part of an alt-weekly battle, I can get Steven Wells to walk around Rittenhouse in a robe, flashing TV reporters.)

Judge Richette isn’t cooperating with the police investigation of her only son, according to sources. While her son has had several run-ins with the law, he hasn’t been convicted of anything. (Duh.)

In October 2005, he was charged with disorderly conduct and the case was referred to Philadelphia Community Court, the branch of Municipal Court created with the help of the Center City District to dispose of minor “quality-of-life crimes” that ordinarily would not be prosecuted because of the caseload of major cases facing the District Attorney’s Office. Court records show that Richette, a writer, former political editor for the Philadelphia City Paper and sometime Democratic activist, failed to appear for his hearing and a bench warrant was issued for his arrest. He does not appear to have been arrested, and the case remains open.

Richette also has a 2001 arrest for driving under the influence, which court records say was withdrawn by the prosecutor’s office, and a 1992 arrest for criminal mischief that also was not prosecuted. In 1987, he was charged with swearing at and then pushing a city police officer after he was brought in following an auto accident in Society Hill. He was acquitted by a Municipal Court judge who admonished him to be more respectful of law-enforcement officers.

He’s also self-published a bunch of books, which I am going to go purchase right now.

Son charged in attack on judge [Inquirer]

PR Guy Drops Drama, Pressler Reference On ‘CP’ Letters Page

Let’s delve into this, shall we? On today’s Letters page of Citypaper, the PR guy from Delilah’s chews out Paper Doll!

Right. I’m not sure what a sex columnist/editor could do to piss off the PR guy for a strip club, but apparently David Witz didn’t like her coverage of the Diamond G-String Award competition, which you may remember from the advertisement in the sidebar here.

His letter reads (the bolding, when you get to it, is most certainly ours):

When Ashlea Halpern volunteered to be a judge at “Delilah’s Diamond G-String Award 2006,” we were delighted to accommodate her. But we had no idea that she’d arrive with daggers hidden in her notebook. Her mean-spirited “Paper Doll” recap of the event ["Hustled," July 27, 2006] may have been a misfired attempt at humor, but the professional choreographers, dancers and stage technicians that worked their “rock-solid bods” off to put on a spectacular show deserved better than her insults, inaccuracies and accusations. At one point, she refers to the show as “Cirque du Soleil — but naked,” a lovely compliment that could cost the club its license (at Delilah’s, toplessness is legal, nudity is not).

Two journalistic tips for Ashlea: You can’t fact-check just by leaving a voicemail, and you can’t become a murderously funny writer just by sitting next to Jessica Pressler.

David Witz
Advertising/Promotions, Delilah’s, The Gentlemen’s Club and Steakhouse
Ed: Our columnist used the word “naked” as a figure of speech, not to imply that the dancers were nude.

Oh snap! I think my head just exploded.

Judge Dreaded [Citypaper]
Hustled [Citypaper]

The End Of Illegal Guns

In this week’s Citypaper, Brian Hickey comes up with a novel approach to end the tide of gun violence in the city: Set up gun checkpoints just like we do with DUIs and frisk everyone in the car to find illegal weapons.

Whoo! That’s quite a bold plan, but he plays the “it’s really no different” card, and I suppose it’s not really all that different than DUI stops. But the idea of being stopped at a checkpoint and frisked because I happened to be driving around an area where they were looking for a few illegal guns kind of makes me [insert your favorite 1984-esque reference here].

Hickey claims that the stops wouldn’t be discriminatory, since they’d be stopping everyone. (In a program in NYC, officers were stopping and frisking — wait for it — a disproportionate number of blacks and Latinos.) I tend to think it discriminates against people who own cars, leaving those who walk, run, bicycle or Segway around with illegal guns safe, but that’s not really the issue here.

Now, before you say, “This is the silliest thing I’ve heard since the 76ers offered free tickets if you gave them their illegal guns,” let me tell you I’ve found out a way to make this novel approach even better. You may remember that a last week Hickey wrote that the then-unknown suspect in the murder of Police Officer Gary Skerski “warrants a shoot-first, don’t-even-bother-with-questions-later response.”

I’m sure you’re seeing where I’m going here: We should set up traffic stops, and if the guy has yellow eyes or looks like he might’ve killed someone, you simply open fire into his chest (with a legal gun, of course!).

Shoot first, don’t even bother with questions later! Problem solved. No long trial, no messy appeals and we can all get back to debating the cuteness of puppies.

Lethal Rejection [CP]
Stops, or They’ll Shoot [CP]
Hoagie Dip 3/1 [PW]
May 19: A Good Day For Snitchin’

I Am Curious (Yellow)

Today’s sex column by Ashlea Halpern in PW’s alt-weekly competitor Citypaper deals with something my paper didn’t cover in our Next issue: The Next Hot Fetish. Naturally, that fetish is “watersports,” which is a nicer way of saying “pissing on each other.”

I’m all for people being able to do whatever the hell they want to in the bedroom, and urine is sterile, so it’s not like this is something that’s going to shake the moral fabric of society. (Expect Rick Santorum to introduce legislation suggesting a ban on it in a few months, then.) But it’s not quite my cup of tea. Or, really, anywhere near it.

Halpern interviews some watersports aficionados, including Rob, a 27-year-old ad exec:

On a fundamental level, Rob likes pee because it feels good. “I also like how it says, ‘I fucking love you so much, you can even do this and it will be hot and we’ll still be cool afterward.’”

The way he puts it, pee play sounds almost romantic.

Yeah. What says ‘romance’ more than piss! I’m sure Rob got a heart-shaped flask of urine for Valentine’s Day.

Yellow Fever [CP]
Next Philadelphia [PW]
Photo by dplanet

Quickies: Hellos and goodbyes and birthdays

• I just got forwarded an email from Charles Bennison, Jr. (left), the Espicopal Bishop of the Diocese Pennsylvania, that says he was asked to resign effective March 31. He writes that “if you felt that I were not leading the diocese effectively and asked me to resign, I would pray about it, and, if I felt it were God’s will, I would do so. I am seriously praying about the Standing Committee’s request, and I ask that you pray for me, for our colleagues throughout the diocese, and above all for the unity and health of our diocese.” As a Catholic, I’m not sure if this is a huge deal, but make of it what you will. The full email is after the jump.

• According to his Myspace profile, indie rock and Princeton basketball guru Jon Solomon will be producing a biweekly podcast featuring local artists called “Local Support” for PW competitor Citypaper starting in March. Looks like I need to saddle up. Or, you know, we can all coexist in this here “Internet” thing. [Myspace]

• A very happy birthday to the Philadelphia Gay News, who is seven years older than me, and they’ve totally kissed more people than I have, too. Boys and girls. [PGN]

• Also, today, none other than Mozart is 250. In, uhm, less fun news, it’s also Holocaust Memorial Day. And while the Apollo 1 disaster killed three astronauts 39 years ago today, the Challenger was nice enough to wait a day and not add to the bummers remembered today. [Wikipedia]

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No child left behind

Yesterday, the Citypaper began its new sex column, which means I think every publication in the city besides The Evening Bulletin has one now. The first column was pretty honest and good, especially for the questions writer Ashlea Halpern got about what will your mother think/how will this affect your career/etc. I especially liked that because I got the same questions when I became a professional blogger. (Some would take that as a slam, but I’m proud to be on the same plane with sex columnists in at least one way.)

Anyway, this paragraph caught my attention (emphasis mine):

My mother raised me like an open book. Sex was never a four-letter word, despite her own intercourse-is-evil upbringing. She talked openly about “the beauty of making love” and taught me how to roll condoms on bananas in the fifth grade. She wasn’t angry when I got booted out of kindergarten for masturbating during nap time and never punished me for drawing pubic hair on my Barbies.

All together now (since you just had the same thought, too): Jesus. I went to the wrong fucking kindergarten.

One Sexy Mother [CP]