|
First, a story: I actually saw Teresa Masterson on the street the other day. She was on Broad Street taking a photo of the Union League. I would have said hello, but I figured it would be bad for my image to be murdered in the middle of Broad Street.
Anyway, here’s a discussion of her latest DigPhilly column.
anonymous reader: you have to read this new digphilly article. teresa masterson visits christopher hitchens!
pwddmac: but she admits she didn’t read his new book in the paragraph five.
reader: first of all, is not teresa masterson’s JOB to write for digphilly?
reader: meaning, if you have to review someone who is speaking at the library, would it not behoove you to actually READ his book?
reader: i mean, i don’t advocate reading his book either, but to announce it to everyone so flippantly?
pwddmac: i can’t believe she likes hitchens so much even though she doesn’t agree with him. he’s pretty much the most un-charismatic person on the planet and i’d probably agree with his annoying god book.
pwddmac: but, i, too, haven’t read it.
reader: i’ve never seen him, mainly because i can barely stomach reading him
reader: i do, however, agree with hitch on one thing: apparently women really AREN’T funny.
pwddmac: hahaha
pwddmac: see, i just laughed
pwddmac: you got THREE has
reader: well, at least one woman is an idiot
pwddmac: “He sternly addressed the anti-war people in the crowd. The soldiers in Iraq defending democracy ’shouldn’t be sneered at in my presence,’ he said.”
pwddmac: i’ll keep all my soldier sneering away from chris hitchens
reader: right, because sneering at the deceitful bloodbath of a war is akin to spitting on soldiers
reader: oh wait, you’re coming up on my favorite part
reader: the droll lavender reference
pwddmac: ha ha i get it!
reader: see, because he’s red AND blue
pwddmac: because everyone else in the world adheres to the strict principles of the democratic and republican parties
reader: lavender is a good war color
pwddmac: “oh my! a public figure who isn’t a shill for a particular political party GASP!”
reader: “maybe i WILL read his book!”
pwddmac: “This man with the British accent had more American spirit than most people I know.”
pwddmac: what exactly IS “american spirit”
pwddmac: does she mean the cigarettes?
reader: there weren’t any photos! i wanted the usual teresa slideshow
reader: why didn’t she hug hitch?
reader: oh, also: “The United States still remains the only country where others’ religious beliefs are not forced on anyone; where people can worship freely; where the government cannot force you to pay homage to any god.”
reader: i know there are “examples” in the next graph, but come on
pwddmac: she might be right. i hear in canada everybody has to make sacrifices to puckface, the god of hockey, while smoking free medical marijuana to recover from government-funded gender reassignment surgery
reader: that is one of the dumber positions she’s ever taken on anything
pwddmac: liking christopher hitchens?
reader: no, that the US is the only secular country on earth
reader: liking christopher hitchens is also pretty stupid too
reader: i hope she just happens to not know that he’s a borderline mysoginist
pwddmac: borderline?
pwddmac: that’s being generous
reader: ok, i was trying to be (uncharacteristically) nice
pwddmac: don’t be nice to hitchens!
reader: i hope she just didn’t do her research
reader: didn’t she just write about how sexist philly.com is?
reader: i want to send her a copy of that vanity fair story
pwddmac: if i link it here hopefully she’ll see it
reader: teresa: seriously. i was on the verge of saying nice things about you recently. please reconsider your position on hitch. thx.
Update: Being Christopher Hitchens. (Thanks, Amara!)
|
