Bizarre Sex, Chess Matches

• In Westmoreland County, Pa., a chess game led to a man threatening to kill himself and shot someone in the ensuing scuffle. Alcohol was involved, the sun came up today, etc.

• Meanwhile, a York County woman died during what CBS 3 calls a “shocking sex act.” Har, har. She was electrocuted!

Police charging documents say Toby Taylor first said his wife was shocked by a hair dryer. But police say when burns were found, he told them he had clipped a cord to his wife and plugged it into an electric strip three or four times.

York County Coroner Barry Bloss calls it a case of “bizarre sex,” and says, “Even if you did it before, you have to know you could kill someone.”

Yes, you do have to know it could kill someone. Chalk it up to inadequate sex ed in our schools.

Quickies: Rooks are the new black

• The month of incessant Ben Franklin continues: today, we all learn that Ben Franklin published the first book about chess in Russia. And, not only that, but this column mentions Latvia, quizzo and features characters named Sal, Roz and The Master. (Sounds like a plot for Matrix 4.) [Metro]

• Speaking of convicted sexual assaulter Tracy McIntosh, his job in Milan may be in doubt. But his lawyer says it was due to erroneous press reports in Italy that he was a serial rapist. Because, you know, if you only raped once, it’s not a big deal, right? sigh. [Inky]

• The choking game: “There’s no way to win,” sez a police officer. I’m telling you: if they bring back the old school cable boxes that allow you to kind of see the porn channel in scramblevision, kids will stop doing shit like this. [Bucks County Courier Times]

• Hey, people: Everything’s all peachy keen between Webber and A.I., okay? In related news, the Sixers have won three straight. If you want a different answer, talk to Webber after the Sixers fall back below .500. [DN]

Your nerdy joke of the day

West Philly criminals are going to have to stick to robbing Penn (and Pharmacy USP ones, too, natch) kids and not Drexel ones pretty soon:

Drexel University has partnered with a local firm to develop a new wireless security technology that could extend well beyond the borders of its West Philadelphia campus.

Once the system is developed and put into place, security guards at Drexel will be moved around like pieces on a chessboard.

Oh, good idea, Drexel. The bishops are going to get hit by cars when you try to move them across the street diagonally!

Drexel U. Designs Security System With Far-Reaching Possibilities [KYW 1060]