Apparent Hot Cop Arrests Half-Dozen

Because there isn’t anything else going on, or whatever, the Bristol Township police force has been cracking down on prostitution recently, including reverse prostitution stings. Oh, I’ll just let the Courier Times describe it:

Police said they had to wait until money and sex were mentioned before making an arrest. Customers waiting to talk to a “prostitute” aren’t breaking the law, they said. Stings involving “working girls” increase in the summer, police said, because street walkers work out in the open and are easier to spot. [...] It was the third time in recent weeks that area police said an undercover “prostitute” was used to capture “johns” — the slang for a hooker’s customers.

Looks like someone just discovered how to make quote marks! Six people were arrested, and it could have been more, but the fake prostitute was just too hot.

But Saturday’s Special Investigations Division undercover operation, also known as a “reversal” because a real prostitute isn’t in the picture — went smoothly.

And there “could’ve been a seventh” arrest, several cops said, except that the potential customer rear-ended another vehicle while staring in the rearview mirror of his SUV. Police said he probably was looking at the undercover female officer, who was wearing tight-fitting shorts while negotiating with a man in a car.

So, uh, the cops went out to harass weirdos looking for sex on the street and ended up causing a car crash. Nice work, officers!

Police crack down on prostitution [Bucks County Courier Times]

‘Trolley’ Crash Has Predictable Timing

Monday afternoon at around 4:20, a Philadelphia Trolley Works bus (which is not really a trolley) crashed onto the sidewalk at 3rd and Market.

Ahh, yes, the fake trolley — i.e., a bus — injured one person; it apparently had its brakes fail. And, yes, if you will note the time, I’m sure you can figure out that’s not the real reason.

“Trolley” crashes onto sidewalk in Old City [SEPTA Watch]
Myspace-style photo actually from some kid’s Myspace

Pretty Much Nobody Can Operate Anything Nowadays

A summary of recent accidents follows below. All of these stories are from Action News‘ website.

• On Route 1 in Bucks County, a cabinet fell off a pickup truck and caused a six-vehicle crash.

Well, okay, that was kind of a random accident, though. At least our trained drivers are a little more careful.

• On Roosevelt Boulevard in the Northeast, an ambulance crashed after another vehicle hit it, causing it to roll over.

Well, okay, but that was a private ambulance and it was hit first. I’m sure our professional drivers — say, pilots — know what they’re doing.

• The Pinelands fire earlier this year was caused by a National Guard pilot who dropped a flare to close to the ground on a bone-dry day, though a senator from N.J. called it more of a “systematic failure.” [AP]

Okay, okay. So the National Guard messed up and caused a fire that destroyed 17,000 acres. But, you know, mistakes are mistakes. Our highest trained pilots surely are top-of-the-line.

• A bunch of astronauts flew drunk. [AP]

Forget it. Nobody should be allowed to operate anything more dangerous than a Barbie® Power Wheels car anymore. Even then, somehow some guy named Ken would probably be killed.

Keystone Cops: Billions And Billions Served

Keystone Cops is a look at police, crime and public safety news. It’s rather, uh, easy to do — yesterday, I didn’t even write any jokes! — so it looks like it’s going to happen every day. Smaller logo coming soon, though I love this photo.

• Cops in Bordentown arrested a man selling crack out of the drive-thru at McDonald’s on Route 130. Customers interviewed said it was the Happiest Meal they’ve ever head. [Camden Courier-Post]

• A former school board president in Reading has been arrested for robbing a bank, apparently unaware this is not the 1890s. A current school board member: “He had a lot of good works in the city. That’s got to count for something.” [AP/NBC 10]

• To be honest, I just want to know the backstory of this incident in Richland: “Don Woodward, 68, of Kintnersville, was charged with harassing an employee at the Dollar Tree on North West End Boulevard on Monday, police said. Barbara Woodward, 63, of Kintnersville, faces disorderly conduct charges stemming from the same incident, police said.” [Doylestown Intelligencer]

• And, in Northeast Philly, a car drove into a building, proving that no place is safe from traffic accidents up there. [6 ABC]

Nightmare on I-95

Yikes. Might want to avoid that area for however long it takes to clean that up, which should be sometime in 2022.

Editor’s Note: Earlier this morning, I’m fairly sure that on KYW 1060, the reporter said an accident on the turnpike was caused by a truck that crashed and caught fire — and it was hard to put out, because it was a truck carrying paper. Tee hee.

Three Major Backups Causing Traffic Delays [KYW 1060]