Slideshow Sideshows

Nearly every day, NBC 10’s website has a bunch of slideshows about teachers who fuck their kids or celebrities over 40 or something else stupid. I can only assume they’re popular, since the site keeps making new ones every day. (Do they have meetings over whether to do “cute pooches” or “celebrity couples”? I hope so.)

One over the weekend, featured above, had Dawn Timmeny being kissed on the cheek by Bono! Outside (what appears to be) the Inquirer building! Oh my God! Big news!

It is nice to know, however, that the Bono starfucking wasn’t just done by our city’s print media, but by the #1 starfuckers themselves, the TV media. I was getting a little confused there for a while. Phew.

Local Twist — Celebrities Caught Kissing [NBC 10]

Liberty Bell To Be Replaced With Copy Of ‘War’

Man, I thought this media blitz was a bit over-the-top, but I didn’t know we were giving him the Liberty Bell.

This is via Johnny Goodtimes, who is now hosting quizzo online, which is sort of so futuristic that he’s not doing it on a Segway is kind of disappointing. Online quizzo hosted by Robot Goodtimes has to be next.

Holy Crap [JGT]

Act Now, Before It’s Too Late

Currently on the front page of Yahoo:

Quick! With just one simple form field in your browser, you can end poverty!

After the jump, we humbly submit an way to end povery. (Er, to “make poverty history,” as Bono would say.)

More »

One Game Really Does Change Everything

Forgive me if posting is a little late for the rest of the day, we’ve been struck with a case of World Cup Fever! (And here I just got over my Pac-Man Fever.) I got a note from Bono that lets me out of work for the next month, because the world has stopped! (Except Bono’s country, Ireland, who didn’t qualify.)

Here’s today’s schedule:

Yes, right now Germany is dominating Costa RIca and, up next, the match the world has been waiting for, Poland vs. Ecuador!

Update, 2:45 p.m.: Besides the U.S., the player to root for, for now, is England’s Peter Crouch. ESPN keeps showing this highlight of him scoring and then doing The Robot.

Your daily dose of ‘Good Day Philadelphia’

The guest who just signed off on Good Day Philadelphia: Bono’s cousin. No, really. Kerri-Lee Halkett — who’s wearing a brace on her hand — introduced him with something like “We couldn’t get Paul Houston Hewson, but we could get Steve Houston Hewson!” I thought it was originally just a weird joke, but, no. Bono’s cousin.

So, yeah. Bono’s cousin. Talking about Bono (who’s in the photo at left). He says he’s actually quite shy. And he’s been to over 100 U2 concerts.

But you know what? This is still better than any guest 10! is going to have this week. I love this city.

Related: Good Day Philadelphia Sucks: The Website

Right on, ‘Time’

Let me begin this morning with the seemingly strange choice for Time’s Persons of the Year. (I always hate the word “Persons.” Wouldn’t “People” be better? Or would that be bad because there’s a magazine called People? Wait, where am I?)

Okay, back to the point: Time’s Persons of the Year are Bill and Melinda Gates and Bono. At first, I simply thought: Well, obviously Bill Gates and his wife are always a good choice, since they plan on giving all their money away. (See, sometimes Microsoft isn’t quite the most evil corporation on the planet.) And, you know, Bono is always cool. But were they the people who influenced the news the most?

I thought about it some more, though, and I think I figured it out. Bill & Melinda: Okay, it’s going to give more publicity to their causes, so I’m down. Plus, hey, it’s nice to see the nerds continue to get revenge.

And Bono? Well, Bono helped put on Live 8. Even though he wasn’t at the Philadelphia concert, remember what happened there? There was a big event in Philly with hundreds of thousands of people and everything pretty much went off without a hitch. In Philadelphia! We can barely put on, say, a Christmas tree lighting ceremony without everyone embarassing themselves. Helping do something like a successful event in Philly doesn’t just deserve Time’s Person of the Year, it deserves the Nobel Peace Prize

Time names Bono, Bill and Melinda Gates Persons of Year [CNN.com]