Bingo Causes Yet Another Tragedy

You know those stories where it’s just so awful you can’t make fun of it? Yeah, this one would be like that, if the headline weren’t “Pa. man blames molesting on wife’s bingo.”

Yes, one Floyd Kinney Jr. pled guilty in Easton on Friday to molesting two underage girls, cleverly shifting at least some of the blame to his wife, who apparently played bingo a lot. Judge Kimberly McFadden wasn’t so impressed with his excuse, saying: “Some people, when their wives are not home, decide to do other things, like clean their living rooms.” (Ooh, and she broke down gender stereotypes, too, by not saying “like watching football.” Huzzah!)

Kinney’s lawyer, though, tried to explain away his comments, but the judge wasn’t having any of it:

“His wife was not home so he was going to perpetrate on someone and he picked these two children.”

Yep. When your wife leaves, you’re definitely going to perpetrate on something. Geeze.

Update, 7:53 p.m.: Fixed the sourcing on that last quote. Whoops.

Pa. man blames molesting on wife’s bingo [AP/Philly.com]