Billy Wagner Bashes 1960s Activists

Oh my god, you guys have to hear this joke ex-Phillies closer and apparent bagel tosser Billy Wagner told about Philadelphia fans. It was so awesome and fresh and new Sports Illustrated’s John Donovan made it his quote of the week!

“This is about the only place I’ve seen that. Shoot, they booed Santa Claus. They’ve taken this to a whole new level…” — Mets closer Billy Wagner, on the fans of Philadelphia, some of whom cheered when Mets shortstop Jose Reyes was injured in an on-field collision Friday

Bahahaha! They booed Santa Claus! Yes, back in 1968 that was quite the story, Billy. Being negative three years old, you must have remembered it well.

The Windup [SI]

Welcome To South Philly, Billy

Well, well, well.

This week brings the Mets to Citizens Bank Park for the first time this year. The Phillies have swept three straight series, have won eight straight games, while the Mets are four games ahead of the Fightins in the NL East.

And the Mets have Billy Wagner as their closer. Wagner, you may remember, was the closer for the Phillies the past two seasons. He was also a wildly popular closer, as fans cheered him like crazy when he got out onto the field and everyone wanted to see him do well.

Oh, wait, maybe not!

“It started the very first time I was there,” he said with a grin. “Stepped on the mound, hadn’t thrown a pitch, hadn’t given anyone any reason to not like me. Right out of the gate. ‘We wish we had [Jose] Mesa.’

“I was like, ‘Whew, I’m going to be a hit in this town.’”

No. No no no. There’s no way that happened. Nobody in Philadelphia likes Jose Mesa. Come on, Billy, if you want to act like you weren’t a fan favorite, you’re going to have to come up with something more realistic than that.

By the way: Boo.

Wagner: I was never a fan fave [Daily News]

Leftovers: Billy Goat

• Oh, the first-place Mets are in town — the red hot Phillies are four games back — and they’re bringing back Billy Wagner with them. (Oh, and “Inning” Endy Chavez, too.) More on this tomorrow morning, but for now, well, don’t pack those booing lungs away just yet. And hope for three blown saves from Billy boy. [Beerleaguer]

• Matt Geiger was totally stoked to buy a custom-made giant house — everything is made for his seven-foot frame — that all our Sixers tickets paid for a few years back. I agree with Enrico at The 700 Level, who notes that the article calls Geiger a “retired NBA star,” obviously the biggest lie in journalism history. [ABC News]

• Axl Rose has announced that Chinese Democracy is coming out this fall. He told this when Sebastian Bach called his cell phone while hosting a radio show. I don’t even need to write a joke. [AP/Philly.com]

• Ah, yes, the woman who had a baby on the Vine Street Expressway yesterday: Care to name him Gridlock? 11th Street? Inquirer subhead: “Second baby arrives much faster than first, couple discover.” Erhm, yes. [Inky]

• Teens in Jersey just don’t get it: A girl only brought bullets to school. Well, at least you can’t really hurt anyone with ‘em. [Camden Courier-Post]