A Nation In Crisis Needs You Now, Sisqo

In recent years, horrible columns with incessant whining of conservative commentators decrying the “nanny state” have risen in numbers that no graph could possibly contain. (Plus, I’m fairly sure conservative commentators are against functions, too, so there’s no point in plotting it anyway.) These columns have risen in such great amounts because commentators have run out of topics, yes. But they’ve also risen because, uh, lots and lots of people are telling us how to live our lives so we don’t manage to kill ourselves.

Some regulations by a government make sense. For example, we have building codes so we don’t all drive our cars into a new barn on Walnut Street. (Or something like that.) We have seatbelt laws because we’re too dumb to wear seatbelts. We have drug laws so the government can oppress us. But sometimes the laws seem to go too far, depriving us of our American right to eat ourselves into a 500-pound ball of fat and die of heart disease at 45. (I think that’s how Patrick Henry died.)

There is an interesting debate to be had, though; if making things like smoking a minor inconvenience actually saves peoples’ lives, does the government have a moral obligation (for lack of a better term) of enforcing these laws? Or does this encroach too much on our own liberty?

Yes, there is an interesting debate to be had, but not here. That’s because this new law is about banning thongs and baggy pants in Trenton.

More »