Alycia Lane On Path To Sainthood

Oh, yea, so Alycia Lane? Remember her? No? Well, she was the center of attention on this website back just two months ago. But since I’ve now moved on to more interesting stories involving demons, I don’t really even remember what she did anymore.

Oh, yeah, the former CBS 3 anchor allegedly punched a cop while sending bikini photos to a married man while calling somebody a “fucking dyke” on Dr. Phil. Anyway, she has a court date today in New York, and Dan Gross is up in New York covering it.

And, ta da, he reports Lane served her one day of community service already and is free to go. She just has to stay clean for six months or whatever.

The final chapter closes on Alycia Lane, and now we can just only hope Jennaphr Frederick punches a fireman or something so we have another local anchor to talk about.

Alycia gets her day in court [Philly Gossip]

Alycia Lane To Stay Out Of News?

It appears the long, drawn-out saga of the pretty news anchor who allegedly punched a cop may be coming to an end.

Dan Gross reported Friday Lane’s case appears headed toward a dismissal. Seems Lane’s counsel has worked out a deal that if she stays out of trouble for six months, the charges will be dropped.

Lane’s lawyers have agreed to an adjournment in contemplation of dismissal; you would think a millionaire wouldn’t have much trouble not breaking the law for 180 days or so, but who knows. Lane’s hearing is Feb. 25, which means there could be an actual chance that we won’t have to hear about her for six months. (I won’t count on it.)

On a side note, here’s a factoid you might not know: Dan Gross and Regina Medina were the first ones to report on the arrest of Alycia Lane. The Daily News has yet to note this.

In other news, Alycia Lane somehow made Rich Eisen hire the publicity firm that works for Page Six, somehow.

Alycia’s Backers Take Page From Ron Paul’s

Alycia Lane’s defenders have hit the Internet, and you’d think she’s like Ron Paulbaro or something:

JC said:

I think that everyone needs to mind their own business and stop riding this lady. Probably most people reading this have much more to hide than her, except for the fact that no one cares about what’s going on with you like they do with Miss. Lane.

InternationalGiant said:
Calling this well-educated, attractive, news person names is typical “Philly-ignorant”. You probably have much more to hide than Miss. Lane, except for the fact that no cares if YOU live or die.

I can’t speak for Dan Gross, but I know plenty of people want me dead.

Oppressed Minority To Sue CBS 3

Oh, you all knew this was coming. Dan Gross reports has filed court papers against CBS 3, almost certainly a prelude to a lawsuit (or settlement) with the company.

Lane and attorney Rosen have also asked for any documents or personnel files pertaining to the firing by CBS3 of “any other anchor or reporter of Latina descent, African-American descent or the descent of any other minority group.” Could Lane, dubbed the “Latina Bombshell” by the People Paper’s Stu Bykofsky in 2003, be playing the race card?

Any other minority group, eh? I knew the unfair termination of Chief Halftown would come back to bite CBS 3 in the ass one day.

Alycia Lane files court papers against CBS3 [Phillygossip]

Lane, Booker Make Out On Dance Floor

BREAKING ALYCIA LANE NEWS MUST CREDIT PWD SIREN.GIF!!!

It appears noted Philadelphia power couple BookerLane are back in Philly and are… well, they are like 17 year sold, since they’re hanging out in Manayunk. I’ll let a Philadelphia Will Do I-Reporter explain via text message:

• I’m at Grape Street Pub, No Code a Pearl Jam cover band is playing, and I’m standing in front of Chris Booker and Alycia Lane, and she hasn’t hit anyone, yet
• She drinks vodka cranberry or something equally girly
• O, they won’t stop making out, fuckers

After the jump, a Philadelphia Will Do bounty.

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Alycia Lane: A Virgin At 23, Apparently

The best thing from the Phillymag’s novel about the Alycia Lane saga is most certainly this factoid on the fourth page about Lane:

In fact, defending herself, she later told people that she hadn’t lost her virginity until she was 23.

Okay, so that should be what people will be talking about. There’s also such a dramatic ending: “Except that person was long gone. In her place was Alycia, out with her celebrity DJ boyfriend and a powerful radio exec, wearing that expensive black designer jacket, her makeup as perfect as it always was on-air, pulling out her iPhone and snapping shots of what she must have thought was news. And then she said the words that both begin and end the story of Alycia Lane, the words that describe who she had been, and had lost, that might actually sound somewhat poetic, in the desperate way that famous last words always are.” Stop! Enough, you had me until that last sentence.

Coincidentally, Andy Reid’s lawyer was present for the creation of this story, too. No, really: Alycia Lane’s lawyer is Andy Reid’s lawyer. Nevermind then. (He’s actually quoted.)

The Fallout: Alycia Lane

Here’s Dan Gross and Regina Medina from the Daily News. Here’s Mike Klein from the Inquirer, who reports Alycia Lane is going to sue CBS 3. Above (give it a second the video is still processing long time since YouTube is being annoying), Larry Mendte manages to not burst into ridiculous laughter when talking about Lane’s departure from the station.

Me, I think this is kind of a mistake by the station. In addition to being weird to fire her for being in the news when it encouraged her to go on Dr. Phil, think how many viewers CBS 3 would have gotten for February sweeps with Alycia Lane’s triumphant return? Apparently, this move will increase CBS 3’s journalistic credibility. Unfortunately, the only real way for a television station to have any journalistic credibility is mass hara-kari.

Philly-Area Nerds Drop Ball

As of 5:17 p.m., Alycia Lane’s Wikipedia page remains silent on her termination from CBS 3. Shocker!

Update: Ha ha, a Philadelphia Will Do reader edited the page! It now reads:

On January 7, 2008, Alycia Lane was fired from her job at CBS3. Lane responded by staging a hostage situation at the station, ultimately resulting in the shooting death of former co-anchor Larry Mendte. The situation is currently under investigation by area police.

Alycia Lane Takes A Fucking Hyke

Sob! Yes, as you’ve no doubt already heard — sorry, I was in a meeting! — Alycia Lane is gone from CBS 3. Here’s the statement.

After assessing the overall impact of a series of incidents resulting from judgments she has made, we have concluded that it would be impossible for Alycia to continue to report the news as she, herself, has become the focus of so many news stories. We wish to make clear that we are not prejudging the outcome of the criminal case against Alycia that is pending in New York. We understand that Alycia expects to be fully vindicated in that proceeding. We hope that is the case and we wish her the best in all her future endeavors.

So, basically, she got her boobs into the news too much and so she got fired.

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Alycia Lane Has A Lawyer

Hey, know what’s a way to not lose your public job? Punching a cop and calling her a “fucking dyke”! (Obligatory: It’s all alleged; Alycia Lane denies it all.)

Dan Gross reports today the identity of Alycia Lane’s lawyer; Paul Rosen has been in discussions with CBS 3 since last week. He also reports the reason Lane wasn’t dropped from the station last Friday was because of Rosen, so Lane is clearly already getting her money’s worth.

So, yes, there is no real new Alycia Lane news, but what else am I going to write about? An anchor who didn’t allegedly punch a cop? Please.

Dan Gross | Alycia has hired a lawyer in a bid to keep her job at CBS 3 [Daily News]