Philadelphia Will Do Update

Hi everyone! Sorry for the lack of posting lately; I saw the sign above outside yesterday (the Obama office is upstairs, in case you forgot) and it made me laugh so hard I broke a rib. Okay, no, the real deal: A combination of a deluge of spam comments and the nearly 8,000 posts I’ve done in three years has made it impossible to post.

But there is hope! (And change!) Soon, Philadelphia Will Do will be undergoing a complete overhaul: New blog publishing system (WordPress) and new design (it’s all purty and doesn’t include half of Camden). It’s all pretty slick: Even permalinks to old pages should just redirect to the new WordPress post that’d been copied over. What an age we live in.

This should all be moved over by Monday, so youse will get to read all my lame jokes, hilarious abridgments of Daily News columnists and all the other random stuff I’ve been attempting to write about the past week or two.

We’ve turned comments off temporarily in an attempt to allow me to post the rest of the day. Keep F5′ing furiously, please.

Update: Hmm, looks like it wasn’t comments killing the system this time. I won’t bore you with my technical troubles and will just give you this update instead: Monday morning, we’ll have a new site design! And be able to post! And you will all just eat it up! Or maybe you’ll all protest the site’s new look and eventually I’ll be fired because nobody will be reading anymore.

I’m the kind of guy who will get really motivated by something like a redesign, even though I really don’t know why. The design guys did a really great job on the new look; hopefully I can match its brilliance with some really great jokes about Philly.com commenters. I mean, really, have you seen some of the comments on this one? It’s like they’re improving superficially but actually getting much, much worse.

Karl Rove In Midseason Form At Penn

Karl Rove spoke at Penn last night, and it seems he was about as truthful there as he was during his time in the White House:

These earlier travels were juxtaposed with Rove’s trip on Air Force One the morning of Sept. 11. After receiving word of the terrorist attacks, Bush and his staff got in the air “as fast as a 747 could.

Was that before or after George Bush won the 100 meter dash at the world championships?

Rove addresses U.S. politics [Daily Pennsylvanian]

Hooray: You Might Not Die Soon

This is the most uplifting sentence you’ll read all day:

If you dial “911″ in Philadelphia for a medical emergency, you may soon have a better chance of surviving.

Well, okay, it’s still a maybe. Hopefully City Council will get on that after they get finished figuring out what to do with the city’s golf courses.

Philadelphia To Add Additional Medical Unites [CBS 3]
Phila. Council takes up city-owned golf courses [Inquirer]

Hey Look, That Dude From 9/11 Was At Geno’s

Oh, man, look the cheesesteak guy endorsed him. The guy who makes cheesesteaks at Geno’s endorsed him. Forget the “Speak-a English” sign, that the endorsement of a cheesesteak maker would help shows this country is doomed, no matter who gets elected president.

Rudy visits Philly [YouTube]

Blood For Hot Dogs And Nachos

A comparison of Daily News front covers.

9/12/01:

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Stu Bykofsky Called ‘Fucker’, Among Other Things

Yesterday, Daily News columnist Stu Bykofsky (at right, apparently posing for a Wall Street Journal headshot) weighed in and said we need another 9/11 to make sure the public knows how important it is to stop terrorism. (Because when given the tools to fight terrorists, the government just does a bang-up job.) I don’t really get the reasoning — “In order to stop terrorists from killing Americans some terrorists have to kill Americans!” — but, hey, people can write what they want to.

Anyway, according to Shawn Mullen, former Daily News staffer and blogger, Stu’s column caused quite a stir on the Internets yesterday: Stu Bykofsky, a columnist for the Philadelphia Daily News… has set off a sh*tstorm by writing that he is hoping for another 9/11 terrorist attack because it would bring Americans together again.” Oh! A sh*tstorm!

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Perzel: Don’t Sell Turnpike To Bin Laden & Co.

John Perzel has a big ol’ op-ed in this week’s Northeast Times. It’s about his opposition to the privatization of the Pennsylvania Turnpike.

Perzel’s plan is to tax commercial vehicles who fill-up in New Jersey and travel through Pennsylvania on the way to Ohio. Yes, this will most certainly work. But Perzel has another reason to not lease the turnpike: Foreign companies might buy it, and that’s an affront to everyone who died on 9/11.

I am not making this up. Emphasis mine:

But there’s an even larger risk as the governor actively seeks foreign investors.

The east-west turnpike that connects Pittsburgh and Philadelphia also serves to connect the rest of the state with interlocking state and interstate federal highways that are crucial in an emergency, as well as for transportation of military cargo from Pennsylvania’s military supply depots to the Port of Philadelphia and beyond.

Do we really want the major highway used by our military and the state police controlled by foreign interests who have no stake in Pennsylvania’s security? [...]

Foreign control of our roads is a frightening prospect in our post-9/11 America, and not a route Pennsylvanians should travel.

Yes! The workers who currently staff the turnpike will suddenly transform to communislamofascists when some Australian company buys the road! Thanks for protecting us, John Perzel!

Don’t lease the turnpike to foreign investors [Northeast Times]
Dec. 6, 2006: East India Turnpike Company?

Giant Drink Tumbler Just What Wildwood Needed

In case you were wondering if Wildwood could get even more condo-fied, well, you’re in luck. The answer’s yes, and the results are… well… that thing at right (click to enlarge).

The monstrosity at right is none other than the Wildwood Beach Hotel & Resort, slated for completion in 2009. It’ll sit directly across from the Wildwood Convention Center, which puts it at around Ocean & Montgomery. It’s not the only new high rise going in on the tiny island. The Atlantic City Press reports that Wildwood recently raised its height maximum — 12 stories — allowing this 25-story resort as well as a bunch of other high rises that already have city approval. (There may be an issue clearing some of the high rises with the state’s Department of Environmental Protection, because of bird migration patterns or something.)

But back to the Wildwood Beach Hotel & Resort. It’s clearly positioning itself as a year-round destination, since it will feature a spa, indoor shopping, an indoor beach and wave pool (!) and a convenient hop, skip and jump to the Convention Center. (The website also calls Wildwood’s sand “finer than any you’ll find in the Caribbean.” There’s more kids’ urine in it, too.)

The design is pretty good up top, with the yellow and oldish motel look. But, uh, giant drink tumbler? Giant lava lamp? Guhwha? It’d look nice and even appropriate without the giant tumbler and lava lamps, but with them, it’s… uh… is there a stronger word than kitschy?

Of course, the $225 million, 190-condo, 150-hotel room resort isn’t just about making money. No, it’s about helping families victimized by 9/11, according to Christian Nickerson (the head of developer Princeton Junction Development Partners):

“As a survivor of the 9/11 attack on Tower One of the World Trade Center, I believe people think differently about travel,” Nickerson says. “Many families would like to have a taste of the Caribbean without the hassles of airport security, passports and a long plane ride. Even in winter, visitors would be able to relax at our indoor beach.”

Oh. Well. God bless your resort, then, Christian. But if your indoor shopping forces the Boardwalk Mall to close, well, there will be hell to pay. There’s a bunch of links below if you want further info on the de-Wildwoodification of Wildwood.

Wildwood Beach Hotel & Resort
Holy Cow, Batman, Wildwood’s Never Gonna be the Same! [Phillyblog]
Coming 2009: Wildwood Condos! Plus Waterpark! And 9/11 Exploitation! [New York Observer Real Estate Blog]
Wildwood developers look to sky [Press of Atlantic City]
Developers Unveil $225M Hotel/Condo Project [Globe St.]

How Michael Smerconish Spent His 9/11

If you haven’t checked out Michael Smerconish’s column today, be sure to give it a whirl.

Smerconish writes a memo to Osama Bin Laden from the “Philadelphia Cell” — who wants to bet they live in Fishtown — about how the Islamofascists are winning the War on America because people watched a football game on 9/11, among other things. It’s strange that the note is in English, but, hey.

Smerconish thinks we (as a nation) didn’t grieve enough, didn’t treat 9/11 seriously enough, aren’t as concerned with Osama Bin Laden as he (and his president, of course) are. With that being said, it’s time to chronicle how Michael Himself spent his Sept. 11, protecting our freedom and helping to bring the Philadelphia Cell to justice.

4:30 a.m. — Smerconish wakes up in his Montgomery County home, makes himself a nice breakfast of Freedom Toast and American Bacon.

5:00 a.m. — Smerconish interrupts his drive to work to get “9/11″ tattooed on his forehead (pictured).

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Temple Professor: Okay To Not Grieve On 9/11; Steve Irwin Jokes Probably Still Not Kosher

In case you haven’t been reading any media today except for this site — and you don’t own a calendar — today is the fifth anniversary of the 9/11 attacks. This is the biggest story in the media since last night, when noted commercial spokesmen Peyton and Eli Manning faced off against each other in a football game.

I don’t really know how Sept. 11, 2006 is any different than the same day in 2005 or 2007, but I suppose five years is a good time to reflect, or grieve, or whatever. But what about those of us who can’t stomach the fact we don’t feel guilty about it? Okay, I’m not quite sure who might feel guilty except for possibly our elected officials — and they clearly have no interest in doing so — but a Temple psychology professor says it’s okay to not feel that way:

Frank Farley is a psychologist at Temple University. He says people can’t have their personal lives devastated by an event they have no control over, so remind yourself:

“‘I wasn’t involved, I didn’t fly the airplane into the twin towers or into the Pentagon, so therefore I bear no guilt.’”

Mohammad Atta, though, ought to be feeling pretty shitty right now.

Local Expert Says It’s OK Not to Grieve on 9/11 [KYW 1060]
Related: Stu Bykofsky | Let’s mark 9/11 with silence