Broad Street Bullies, Vol. 2

I took a ton of videos on Wednesday night, but the best two were back-to-back. There was the car-flipping I posted yesterday; above is the video I took a minute or so later.

So, um, since when did Mega Man give up his arm gun and switch to batons? That doesn’t seem like the best way to defeat the evil Dr. Wily and his robot masters!

Everyone Loves A Phillies Parade!

It’s Parade Day! Yes, folks: Today, for the first time ever, the city of Philadelphia will have a parade.

Okay, so maybe not. But this will be the first time in 25 years a sports team will get a parade in Philadelphia. If you haven’t been paying attention, the Philadelphia Phillies recently became the first pro baseball team to land on the moon. Hence the celebration!

A million billion people will be in the city today to celebrate the team of nine strangers who play in South Philly; it starts at noon at 20th and Market and will get down to the stadiums by about 1:45. Ooh, I’m totally sure Ferko String Band is going to win this year!

As you may have heard, Mayor Nutter has told people not to be a jackass during the parade. During the 1980 parade, liquor stores and banks were closed across the city, but (don’t worry!) this year liquor stores will remain open.

Phillies Fans Learn Valuable Lesson

That valuable lesson? Don’t stand on top of a bus shelter in a group. [via Awful Announcing]

Bootleg Rubber Ducks Best Way To Celebrate Phillies World Series Win

Hey kids! Pumped about the Phillies? Don’t waste your time buying the official merchandise; that’s for big time liberal rich folk. And don’t bother with that Why Can’t Us merchandise either. How dare someone capitalize on a catchphrase and give all the money to charity.

What you really need is some bootleg Why Can’t Us merch — a rubber duck, no less!

What would a World Series be without rallying cries and symbols? Past years gave us Rocktober, the Rally Monkey and Homer Hankies.

This year the Philadelphia Phillies have adopted a rubber duck and the slogan, “Why can’t us?”

Somebody from Radnor has 100 of these to sell, so, um, get ‘em while they’re hot.

Philadelphia Phillies Rubber Duck [eBay]

Shane Victorino, Flying Squirrel

Okay, enough video of college-aged kids being idiots in the street. It’s time to go nuts, animated GIF style.

Aww, yeah. That’s more like it.

‘I Got That On Video’

You sure did, man. You sure did.

(This clip totally looks like it was staged. Like 100 percent. But I don’t see any way how that’s possible. How do they know this is a Rays fan, too? Did this dude survive the fall? Who thought it was a good idea to throw a 40 at somebody? And what a fucking shot! Can the Phillies sign this guy up to replace Pat Burrell in left?)

Broad Street Bullies

Here are some people, flipping a car at Broad & Walnut last night. Sorry for my clumsy narration at the beginning (my voice sounded even more annoying that usual last night, apparently).

Cops in riot gear always remind me of Mega Man. They should totally give them the Metal Blade, it’d be way easier to subdue a rowdy crowd with that kind of equipment.

Last Night’s Broad Street Bash

Here’s PW footage on Broad Street after the game. Be sure to watch at least until the guy in the giant beer bottle costume shows up.

Phillies Fans Too Excited To Properly Flip A Car

Gee, guys, that’s a good try, but is that really World Series effort?

We’ll be celebrating vandalism here on Philadelphia Will Do all day, apparently.

[via Walkoff Walk]

Allow Meeeeee…

I’m still pretty excited. Took them long enough, but finally I can remember a Philadelphia team — the Phillies, no less — winning a championship.

Then I saw photo #7 on the Inquirer’s “Chaos in the streets” gallery:

Yes, somebody knocked over “Allow Me.” Now: I am even more excited.

Also looted: Robinson Luggage, for some reason. Philadelphians are weird.