PW’s Alli Katz was apparently not as tired of the election as I was and lugged a video camera all across the city yesterday, including the Famous 4th Street Deli. There, she interviewed Anne Dicker and Johnny Doc, who both lost to Larry Farnese in the First District Senate Race. What a sad video!
It’s been roughly an hour since the polls closed, and… we dunno. Hillary Clinton is ahead on early returns, with about 3 percent of the vote, and notorious funnyman Bill Bennett is now saying on CNN that Barack Obama can’t win, so that means Hillary Clinton has won the nomination.
Or maybe not! It was 55-45, Clinton, a minute ago and now it’s 53-47. Meanwhile, the Flyers were up 2-1 on a cheap goal but then fell asleep and let the Capitals tie the game. The Phillies, who aren’t on TV apparently (update: Oh, they’re on 57. Stupid Comcast.), are scoreless. Since the Phillies and Flyers will each be winners or losers tonight — unlike the pointlessness of the Pennsylvania primary, it seems — I think I’ll be paying attention to those the rest of the night.
Ward 5, Division 13. Irrate pro-Hillary business owner (of Bolivian extraction) of store adjacent to polling place kicked Obama signs, paid people on the street to tear signs down, confronted and physically intimidated Obama campaign volunteers and pursued workers to their local office down the block where he continued his intimidating behavior until escorted out/asked to leave.
We salute you, irate pro-Hillary Bolivian, for making this election day worthwhile.
And then he said “shit,” because he’s a normal person and lots of people say “shit” all the time, probably way more than Bill Clinton does, and it has to be really stressful when you’ve already done this twice and your wife was supposed to be the nomination lock and now there’s this upstart freshman senator who everyone likes more than you. Right?
And so he says, “I don’t think I should take any shit from anybody on that, do you?” in response to his record on racial issues. Because Bill Clinton freed the slaves and everyone knows he is unassailable, as he is the first black president.
Citizen Mom went down the shore over the weekend and spotted this wall of incredible bootleg t-shirts on the Wildwood boardwalk, including shirts for Obama, Clinton and even creepy old John McCain. The “Osama for Obama” one begs the question: No “Barry Hussein” shirts?
On this election day, it’s important to remember the candidates who have since passed us by and gotten us to this point. On the Democratic side, there’s a bunch of well-meaning goobers who couldn’t possibly raise as much money or get as many votes as either Obama or Clinton; on the Republican side, there’s a ton of idiots who couldn’t even beat John McCain. Remember when Fred Thompson from the television was going to be president?
The seventh- and eighth-graders were asked to pick among Obama, Clinton, John McCain, Ron Paul or Mike Huckabee.
Obama captured about 60 percent of the 253 votes cast in the mock election to Clinton’s 30 percent, officials said. McCain received about 9 percent, Huckabee collected just under 1 percent of the vote and Paul received no votes in the mock election, officials said.
Have we extinguished the Ron Paul menace? Is the income tax just not an issue for seventh and eighth graders? All I know is there are some pretty smart seventh- and eighth-graders in Bensalem. No doubt they will soon all be harassed at their homes and places of business by angry Ron Paul fans wondering why they didn’t vote for him.
After 84 million weeks or so of build-up, primary day is finally here. Oh happy day! You guys know the drill: Send in funny stuff, don’t send in funny stuff, whatever. Frankly, I am just so happy that I can watch TV again without seeing a million political ads. It’s a miracle!
