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Wretched Refuse Of Your Teeming Shore, Indeed

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The Inquirer’s long profile of longshot Republican mayoral candidate Al Taubenberger contained an interesting tidbit about his family’s past:

Alfred Sr., who came to America in 1930, was detained in 1941 for almost 18 months at Army bases in New Jersey, Maryland, Texas and North Dakota.

Taubenberger made the discovery while applying for visas for a family trip to Germany. His father hadn’t told him “because he never wanted me to have a bad feeling about this country, which he loved so much.”

He loved this nation that locked him up without cause for 1 1/2 years. God bless America!

Uphill climb for Taubenberger [Inquirer]

Al Taubenberger Views Mayoral Race As T-Ball Game

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Republican mayoral candidate Al Taubenberger, on his uphill battle for the mayoral nomination:

“I don’t think any Republican nominee in a long time has had as much fun as I have,” he said.

Well, I’m sure he’s having more fun than previous Republican nominee Sam “Party All Night” Katz, whose sense of humor I am familiar with. Hopefully Taubenberger can continue to have fun, and maybe the mayor’s race will end in a tie or something. Everybody wins!

Focused on City Hall [The Bulletin]
April 9: Sam Katz Angrily Responds To Idiot Blogger

Taubenberger: Give Me Money Even If You’re For Nutter

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It may not seem like it, but there are just 82 days left until the mayoral election. It seems like just yesterday Milton Street was announcing his candidacy by singing while draped over a casket, but, yes, we are under three months away from Michael Nutter (D) vs. Al Taubenberger (R).

Everyone knows Nutter already has the mayor’s race locked up — he is, after all, a Democrat in Philadelphia running against a German-speaking ex-landscaper from the party of President Bush — but that doesn’t mean Taubenberger doesn’t get a chance to make his bid for mayor. Even if his website is worse than Larry West’s or his campaign literature (at right) includes a photo where they didn’t even bother to go into the bright light. (Vote for Al Taubenberger: The shadow knows!)

Taubenberger is by all accounts a tremendously nice guy and fairly competent, especially for a Northeast Philly native. (More competent that I am, at least.) Basically, if he were running against John Street, you’d vote for him.

But his website, though. Let’s take a look.

You’ll notice the flip side of the card. Page 2. Most candidates list issues they believe in. We all believe in the same thing. We want more jobs, (actually, that’s my specialty) better schools (we have to raise the bar and demand more from students,) safer streets and honesty in government. As you might have noticed, I didn’t list issues. I asked for contributions so I can run TV commercials and do some newspaper ads. I didn’t think I’d get much, but I was surprised. I got more than enough to pay for the piece. A lot more. And that’s the kind of mayor I want to be. Do more with less.

P.S. Surprise me. Fill out the reverse side of the card and send a few bucks so we can get the word out about the issues that are important to all of us. Send something even if you’re for Mike. Worst case possible, he’ll hear some great ideas.

“That’s the kind of mayor I want to be. No issues, no bullshit, right now I just need your money in order to run the campaign. I’ll even take your money if you’re voting for Nutter.” Hey, he’s right, I am loving his honesty.

MayorAl2007
Archives: Al Taubenberger

You Can Call Him Al

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While Republican mayoral candidate Al Taubenberger’s website remains unchanged since May, he is starting to make some headway in the traditional campaigning front. The Daily News‘ Clout today reveals Taubenberger’s new campaign literature, which features a photo of Al Taubenberger looking like he just got out of bed to do some landscaping (one of his previous jobs) and the catchy slogan, “My name is Al.”

He also uses his daughter, Sarah, in the lit. She just graduated from Central — what, Hubert’s was too good for her? — which means there is going to be a magnet school smackdown by the time election day rolls around. (Olivia Nutter goes to Masterman. Did Larry West go to GAMP or CAPA?)

Anyway, kudos to Al for avoiding the “You can call me Al” slogan, if only because it lowers the chances we will have to hear that god-awful song during the campaign.

His media advisor, Elliott Curson, says there probably won’t be any TV ads and that “[w]e’ll be doing stuff and we’re gonna have fun. I want people to say he’d be a decent mayor even if they don’t vote for him.” Whoo! This is the friendliest mayor’s race ever.

Clout | So let’s give a warm Philly welcome to Al [Daily News]
May 24: Mayor Al Dabbling In Poetry

Larry West Has A Wikipedia Page

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In the “criticism” section:

On an article written by Daniel McQuade, a writer for Philadelphia Weekly for the Philadelphia Will Do blog, he wrote, “It’s becoming more and more apparent Larry West is an art-school prank or perhaps the new host of Punk’d.”

For the record, Philadelphia Will Do is 100 percent in favor of Larry West’s candidacy. I will be sad when Larry’s Wikipedia page is nominated for deletion.

Larry West [Wikipedia]

The Friendly Mayor’s Race

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We all know how it really works: Michael Nutter won the mayor’s race on May 15. The democrat has no chance of being beaten by Al Taubenberger (or, for that matter, ineligible candidate Larry West), unless pictures of Nutter with a dromedary that is not his wife surface.

But, of course, we citizens are supposed to pretend that’s not the case, because it’s nice to keep up the democracy facade, even though only 100,000 people voted for Nutter. (But whatever. The press wanted Nutter to win anyway, right?) But the good thing about the continuation of the mayor’s race is that it’s going to be the friendliest mayor’s race in history. Both Nutter and Taubenberger don’t want to attack each other at all.

“I wanted to set the tone of the campaign and make sure it was a positive one,” Taubenberger said. Besides pledging to trade oatmeal recipes, he said, “We exchanged phone numbers so we can get a hold of each other very, very quickly” if need be.

I believe these two are going to make the city a happier place to live in. Soon, drug dealers and police will be exchanging oatmeal recipies, and homeless will be breaking bread with Rittenhouse Square residents.

Michael Nutter, reluctant celebrity [Inquirer]

Larry West Continues This Mayoral Thingy

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Larry West continues his art-school prank/mayoral candidacy tomorrow with a rally at his own house! West, as you may know, is only 22, making him ineligible to run for mayor. However, he’s working to change that with a petition allowing 18-year-olds to run for mayor. (Apparently, in Pennsylvania anyone over the age of 18 can run for elected office. Frankly, I agree. I like to see kids run for elected office and then lose in a landslide.)

The rally at Larry’s house — it’s private, sorry folks — will include punch, pie and music as well as feature a special concert from Larry, featuring Megadeth’s “Peace Sells.” West says he’ll speak at the rally and explain what happened when he tried to ask for the mayoral nomination at the Green Party meeting earlier this week.

I don’t know if West has a shot at the mayoral nomination, though I do hope this leads to the other candidates doing concerts of their own. Michael Nutter can DJ as Mix Master Mike and Al Taubenberger can dance and sing (what else) “The Pennsylvania Polka.”

Full release after the jump.

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And We Still Have Five More Months Of This

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The election isn’t over, Philadelphia! That’s the message of ineligible mayoral candidate Sanjaya Larry West, who announced today he had joined the Green Party and would seek their mayoral nomination at tomorrow’s meeting. It’s becoming more and more apparent Larry West is an art-school prank or perhaps the new host of Punk’d.

Apparently Kerry Foster, the presumed Green Party candidate, didn’t get the 2/3 vote required to win the mayoral nomination, so Larry West wants to get on the agenda for the Green Party’s meeting and then get some party backing for his ineligible mayoral run. “I’ve been talking to Brian Rudnick, the Green Party Candidate for the 8th Council District, and he really supports this!” Larry’s release says he said.

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Ineligible Mayoral Candidate Angry Press Isn’t Giving Him Shot

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Larry West, the mohawked 22-year-old candidate for mayor who is technically ineligible to run, is positioning himself for his independent mayoral candidacy now that the Democratic primary is over.

But he’s also lambasting the press for not giving himself, Republican candidate Al Taubenberger and the ghost of Joseph S. Clark enough of a shot.

You can only imagine how aggravating it is to wake up and see people declaring Nutter “Mayor-Elect”; that, despite the fact the actual mayoral election isn’t for another 6 months. All the local media outlets began to join in the chorus, Fox News calling him just that, and all the other stations reminding viewers that Philadelphian’s have not elected a non-Democrat in over 50 years. But trust me when I say this, I intend on changing that.

I don’t know, Larry. I don’t know if I can come up with enough agitprop to make Edward R. Murrow cringe to help you in your campaign. We’ll see, though.

Never say never! [Larry West for Mayor Blog]

Mike Nutter: He’s Just Like Us!

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Here we see Michael Nutter mingling with the common populace at Black Sheep last night after his win. (Of course Nutter goes to Black Sheep. It makes perfect sense, no?) He’s apparently mid-dance here, re-enacting the music video for “Thriller.”

Perhaps tonight, Nutter will return to Black Sheep and further his “good week” by defeating reigning Johnny Goodtimes Quizzo Spectacular champions Duane’s World.

Nutter Primary Party [Flickr]