Still Winless Since Opening Night

I’m now officially mired in a slump worse than Ryan Howard. I had a tremendous offseason and looked poised to dominate this season in the Rock Paper Scissors City League. Whoops! After a first-round loss at Dirty Frank’s on Tuesday night, I still have not once a match since the opening night of the league season.

As such, I still don’t have much to write about. I’m tied for eighth in the league simply by sheer volume and the fact that all the season events are within stumbling distance of my apartment. My record, I believe, is 1-8 (I might have won two matches the first night). I’ve acquired more free packs of cigarettes from cigarette guys (6) this year than I have matches won — and I don’t smoke.

I did win a match in a bonus second tournament at The Dive last week, but it was against Sarah (aka Gossip Girlfriend) and was in a tournament that wasn’t for points. I made her play Tuesday night and she did the Danny Awesome! name proud by losing in the first round.

Tonight is the weekly event at The Dive, 9:30 p.m. If you go, be sure to call an official Philadelphia Will Do timeout.