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Merry Christmas From Philadelphia Will DoMay your Christmas Day be as joyous as the day you heard the news this stupid horse was finally dead and you’d never have to hear about him again. That’s how it went, right? |
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It’s 5 o’clock on Christmas night, and my wife will wake up soon to get ready for her 8 PM to 8 AM shift as a veterinary nurse, covering for Christians who have the day off. She was one of Barbaro’s nurses. She worked very hard to save him, as did many. He died anyway, as animals will. She has seen hundreds, thousands maybe, of animals die, but this one was different. She cried for three days, and still thinks about him, I know. If your posts about Barbaro were funny at all, I would share them with her — dark humor heals. But they are not. You must be one sad, lazy writer. Or just an ass. It takes, I suppose, all kinds. Happy Holidays.
Show her some photos of Alycia Lane in a bikini. I’ve heard rumors that they can heal a broken heart.
i dunno man, i laughed. maybe because i don’t take the death of a horse super seriously. oh you’re so gracious wishing him a happy holidays you are so much better than him. sad.
he didn’t even write anything all that mean.
Ha, I don’t believe any of these comments so far are real. Okay, I believe ALB’s is his.
Hey 1st comment tard,
My mom is a “veterinary nurse” who didn’t work on barbaro. That’s not what their jobs are called fakey mcfakecomment.
This was really nasty and insensitive. I usually enjoy your blog and even link to it. But this was pretty much one of the most heartless things I’ve ever seen a blogger post. If this is an attempt at humor, it’s safe to call it a failed attempt.
wait, you link to his blog and read it and think this is the meanest thing he’s ever posted?
I’m sure he’s posted meaner things about Alycia Lane and she’s a person and like…counts.
Chrissmari, This is the nastiest thing I’ve read on this blog. Last time I checked, Barbaro wasn’t some news anchor sending bikini pix. He wasn’t in a slugfest w/ NYC’s finest, acting all high and mighty. Plus, Lane could come over and beat D-Mac silly (he’d probably like that). You’re right, Barbaro was just a frickin’ horse. Suggesting, on Christmas Day, that we should be “joyous” that this magnificent animal is “finally dead,” is disgusting.
old people really should give up the internet for new years or grow a funny bone.
Oh, DMac. xoxoxoxoxo. I’m stuck working the day after Christmas and this is the only thing to make me laugh all day.
chrissmari, Really? This was humor? Young people should stop being so insensitive at Christmas. You can be funny without beating on a dead horse.
You can be funny without beating on a dead horse.
see? that was funny (well funny-ish). Well done.
I know this will upset a lot of people, but Barbaro won those races because of steroids. I injected him in the buttocks in his stable while Michael Matz watched.
Out here in the fields
I fight for my meals
I get my back into my living.
I don’t need to fight
To prove I’m right
I don’t need to be forgiven.
no, no, no, no, no
oh man that bernie kosar commenter guy is hilariously hilarious
hahahaha boo hoo he made fun of the horse. guess what? people make jokes about barbaro. you really took time out of your day to get really angry (several times, even, since you also posted about it on your own blog) about a joke about a stupid horse you never met and saw on the teevee.
oh boo hoo somebody made fun of his death. know what’s also funny? the death of your mother! hahahaha. peopel make jokes about that stuff, too, all the fucking time. check out encyclopedia dramatica. now you’re really pissed, right?
god dammit now i’ve spent too much time on this dammit all to hell.
the encyclopedia dramatica article about me isn’t that funny. someone should fix it. kthnx
or write one about alycia lane and mark cohen’s penile love child
Haaayy friends, itsss meeeee, Barbaro!
i AM n HEagen, its soooooo beeeeeuuuuuaaatiful!
I REeeed ths blloog allllllllllll d tiiimmE! I LOVE IT!
bbe nice 2 horses!
A link on a Barbaro page led me to your blog, which I have read daily since. I loved Barbaro, but I also have a sense of humor. Today’s video made me cry, but most of the time you make me laugh, so I guess we’re even. For the record, I still miss Barbaro and am sorry that his story ended so tragically.
it made me laugh until i cried, so i cried too. mariah carey christmas songs are already awesome, but barbaro makes them even awesomer.
@chrissmari:
My wife is a Certified Veterinary Technician. She is called a Vet Tech by some, a Nurse by others. I’ve heard the people at hospitals where she has worked use both terms. I chose one to use in my comment. Which part of this makes me a “tard”? Just wondering.
Does it hurt your head to know everything all of the time?
@bob:
While I did not say I was “better” than dmac, I also did not use a desultory post about a sad death from 11 months ago to wish readers a joyous religious holiday. Which one is sad, now?
@dmac:
Not believing in the realness of comments does not abrogate your responsibility to be marginally funny or partially entertaining. My thoughts are as real as the Cheeto dust under your fingernails. Why would I spend the time to make this up?
DMac, why do you beat a dead horse. LITERALLY! You are LITERALLY beating a dead horse. Why do you do that. LITERALLY.
I do what no other rabbit would dare!
I’m with Jumpmonk on this. I see the humor in some of the clever comments, especially ZombieBarbaro. But I’m just not seeing any humor or entertainment in that Christmas Day post.
And for daring to point out what is so painfully obvious to anyone with the slightest sense of decency, Jumpmonk is called a tard in a highly intelligent retort by the author of this blog.
How clever! And how sensitive, too! I’ll bet Alycia Lane is crying at his door.
Next Christmas, why not post a video of a few pit bulls ripping each others’ throats out? That should be a hoot. Or maybe BigMac can post a few snuff films on Easter Day with some nice Easter music. That should have most of you rolling on the floor.
The name goes after the comment. Anyway, I’m uploading some Faces of Death to YouTube now in preparation for my birthday.
Oopsie! Confused you with one of your minions. Don’t let me interrupt your preparations. Maybe you can throw in a few human sacrifices while you’re at it.
Wait–DMac has a responsibility to be marginally funny or partially entertaining? When did that become a requirement, and who is the arbiter?
@Lynn:
Good point.
I assumed that “a blog about the funniest city on earth” would be funny, or at least entertaining, and that the writer would live up to the requirements of their own tagline. I should not have.
I also assumed aribiters = editors. Not so. My bad.
Hell, I guess I’ll just go read something that’s actually funny.
On Christmas Eve, the ghost of Barbaro raped me. Twice.
On Christmas Eve, the ghost of Barbaro raped me. Twice.
On Christmas Eve, the ghost of Barbaro raped me. Twice.
Barbaro and Ron Paul are fornicating in my front lawn. Seriously, I’m watching now. It’s hot.
Jumpmonk, you’re right in that you should not have assumed “that “a blog about the funniest city on earth” would be funny, or at least entertaining”. All that says is that this blog will be about Philadelphia. It is. Therefore, DMac certainly “lives up to his tagline”, as you put it.
As for whether it’s funny or not, I think it is and clearly, you don’t. I will continue to read this blog, and you don’t have to.