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Liveblog: Phillies Go For Sweep

[Courtesy of phillyskyline]

The Phillies play the Mets today at 1:05 today at the Bank. The Phils have won the first three games of the series and outscored the Mets 16-6 to boot. That the Phils have only given up six runs — and the bullpen has been scoreless — is exactly the reason why they get our hopes up every year around this time.

Well, consider me fooled again. I’ll be keeping an eye on the game after the jump this afternoon. Haw, haw.

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Phila. Suburbs New Hot Spot For, Uh, Space

The Philadelphia area may not be the bed of high-tech innovation, but a firm in the suburbs is making a buck on the lucrative field of space tourism.

ETC said in a press release that its contract with Virgin “puts Pennsylvania on the map as the current center of commercial space training.”

The center of commercial space training. We’re entering into a new golden age for Pennsylvania, people.

Would-be space tourists to train in Phila. area [Phila. Business Journal]

Phillies’ Opponent Screws Up For Once

Here’s how the Phillies won last night, in hilarious fashion. A takeout slide outside of the basepath — or something, baseball rules are so annoying sometimes — gave the Phillies the win over the Mets and put them in position for a sweep this afternoon at 1.

The Pa. LCB: Annoying You Since 1932

As you can tell from the promotional photo for the PLCB I swiped from gophila.com, Pennsylvanians have a deep love for their Liquor Control Board. How else to explain the 75th anniversary celebration for something called the Liquor Control Board?

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Abridged ‘Daily News’ Columnists

God dammit all the columns today are on subjects I have absolutely no interest in hearing about. It’s the end of the summer! Write about babes on the beach or how awesome puppies are or about how the sky is blue. Or the gay bathroom sex senator from Idaho! And: Michael Smerconish, write about something other than sports. I already read enough horrible columns on the sports pages, I don’t need to read another one on the opinion page.

Consider this a public service that I’m summarizing (”summarizing”) these columns today because I really don’t want to.

Michael Smerconish: It’s about how the media is treating Andy Reid’s kids unfairly or something. Yes, I really want to hear more about Britt and Garrett Reid and how they need help (and the one needs Accutane).

Ronnie Polaneczky: It’s a sad story about a woman who lost 1 1/2 legs from a gunshot wound and it’s all sad and I don’t want to read it.

Stu Bykofsky: Some reverend wants money to rehab his church, and he wants it from Wachovia, which didn’t do anything wrong, and he pickets outside the bank’s headquarters. I cannot think of a better way to serve Jesus than picketing a bank to get them to give you money. Actually, this column was decent enough.

My Mormon Mission Is Finally Over

Yes, that’s right: Today is the two-year anniversary of Philadelphia Will Do, and I hope you celebrate it the same way I do: By cutting work and going to the Phillies game. (Kidding, I’ll be here, though you should do that.) Thanks to all my co-workers, all the wacky people who make this job a blast sometimes and you, for inexplicably reading this BS every day. Aww, doggies!

Photo via Flickr]

For Better And For Worse

The Center City Weekly Press redesigned its website. The edgy 1998-style logo is probably modeled on the artwork of Trent Reznor or the World Wrestling Federation, and the site is infinitely easier to read.

But the site also features a talking female robot/fake newsbabe, perhaps the cousin of Irresistible Ella, making it infinitely worse to visit. I’m not sure what happens when to infinities collide, but best not to think about it if it tears the universe apart or something.

Weekly Press
Archives: Irresistible Ella